-

7 Nov

2011-11-07T05:27:00.000-08:00

exploding..
trying hard to keep everything in..
help me, God..

13 Mar

2011-03-13T03:14:00.000-07:00

i've broken the promise to myself
and laid it out there to be cut up
i really hope i've learnt my lesson
after so many times

i'm tired..i really am..
i don't want to feel this feeling again
so i've decided to distance myself
from all you people

i don't want to say this but
since there's possibly no one here
and it kills me if i don't vent somewhere
you who's reading,
i think you know who you are
YES YOU.
I LOVE YOU OKAY
I REALLY DO

now goodbye....

9 May

2010-05-08T21:52:00.000-07:00

from here then on,
it's time to abandon this lil place of mine.

from here then on,
there will never be anyone
who will know what lies in my heart.

from here then on,
i shall hide all my true feelings and emotions.

from here then on,
everything shall be sealed away.

it's time to move on.
RadicalLove

1 May

2010-04-30T10:27:00.000-07:00

a whole week of ups and downs,
sick, giddy and eventually a tinge of happiness,
plus confusion.

seen those movies where the half dead
rise up and fight because they have an objective in mind?
i've been there within the week.
can't say its a good experience but well ...

let this be the first,
and hopefully the last.
RadicalLove

17 Apr

2010-04-16T09:05:00.000-07:00

posted to SISPEC ~
vocation is infantry leader,
meaning i will be leading recruits in future ~
hurray ? hahaha
i promise i will be good *wink* xD

为什么我总觉得，

老天爷在整我。。

刚认识了小公主，

有那么一点点喜欢，

却不让我好好了解她。。

不能在她身旁，

是我的感慨。。

她总是对我说对不起，

但真正要说的人是我。。

不能在她身边鼓励她，

在她需要我的时候，

给她依赖。。

这是考验吗？

看我俩有没有缘分？

我也希望我对她的感觉，

经得起考验。。

我也知道，

她可能对我没感觉，

但对我而言，

只要她开心就好。。

真希望，

小公主不要被带走。。

等我，

好吗？

没人读的部落格，

是我最好发泄的地方。。

感慨。。。

write your sorrows in the sand,

so that the sea can wash them away.

carve your anger in the wood,

so that the fire can burn them away.

engrave your happiness in your heart,

so that you can feel it in every heartbeat.

inspiration from lil princess,

RadicalLove

12 Apr

2010-04-11T09:40:00.000-07:00

"Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing.
There is a time for silence.
A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny.
And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it’s all over."

Have I been a good friend to you who is reading this ?

whose eraser am i ?
RadicalLove

3 Apr

2010-04-03T02:56:00.000-07:00

sometimes i wish you'd tell me more,
but i guess it's fair,
since i didn't tell you all either..

I'm dancing this dance alone,
RadicalLove

28 Mar

2010-03-27T20:32:00.000-07:00

well i saw this lil post on some blog,
and it makes alot of sense to me

"Are you the kind to always approach the ones you love and care about, to ask about how they are, even though they never seem to need you in their life?
Doesn’t it get tiring, after a while?"

everything seems worth it,
when it's you (:
RadicalLove

20 Mar

2010-03-20T00:03:00.001-07:00

rain rain rain,
why can't it rain more over at the little island next to singapore?

when all i wanna know more about is you,
RadicalLove

7 Mar

2010-03-07T02:25:00.001-08:00

。。一个人在夜里继续的奔跑，
缺发现再也听不到自己的心跳。。
RadicalLove

6 Mar

2010-03-05T09:39:00.000-08:00

back frm field camp !
fun week ~
but got sick,
supposedly got scarlet fever,
sigh @.@

got my A's results too,
but i ain't happy
i was but the feeling just flew away
it's just feels empty,
like there's no one to share your joy in achieving something good
darn,
i feel so useless right now,
someone encourage me please.
the right one that has yet to come ):

when there's no one but you,
RadicalLove

21 Feb

2010-02-20T20:25:00.000-08:00

field camp coming up !!!
means i wont be home for 2 weeks ):
and i still havent get a chance to meet friends .
sighhhhhhhhh
there seems to be a severe lack of time for NS men
x_x

how important am i?
am i still a negligable being?
RadicalLove

15 Feb

2010-02-15T08:27:00.000-08:00

Army life is better than expected ,
just that theres so lil time to do personal admin ..
ah wells,
looking forward to the tekans in this coming week,
which is like a day frm now x.x

To a friend of mine:
there are many friends ard us,
but how many of them do we actually know?
and by know,
i mean knowing them inside out.
for me, i dont have any, yet.
there is one though,
but i don't consider him cuz i still don't know him well enough.
point is,
hw well did u know him?
are you going to make the same mistake again
by giving in to someone who u dont really know in future?
i realised that, i hardly know anyone at all.
thus i hope that i can start by knowing u better,
and make u one of the few that i get to know first (:
i hope that u can get better asap,
bringing people joy is my goal (:

you just met the wrong person (:
RadicalLove

26 Jan

2010-01-25T09:30:00.000-08:00

aye ~
It's been VERY long since i blogged.
I'm lazy(+est) to do anything these days,
lazy to walk out of my room,
lazy to go out,
lazy to gym,
lazy to run...
dang, must be the pre-NS syndrome haha.

I don't have much worries about NS really,
it's just that I dread growing up that's all.
The thing that I fear most is reality, I guess.
They say the world out there is harsh,
and kind people get swallowed by the crafty.
I'm not the kind to be crafty towards others,
not one bit.
And I certainly don't want to change this.
I prefer to be the kind, naive dude.
At least I don't have to crack my head
over how to step on others to get to success.
Life's short man,
seeing others happy is what makes me happy :)
And they say NS trains boys to be men,
GREAT @@"

And,
I'm slowly beginning to understand,
why adults say they love to be students.
Now that I'm free to do some thinking,
I feel that a student's life is the most carefree.
Think about it.
As a student, you don't have to earn your keep.
You have more holidays than an adult and
small money just seem so big.
iPod, games, consoles are luxuries for a student.
Cars, houses, career are luxuries for an adult.
See the big big difference in value?
It's so much easier to be satisfied being a student,
than being an adult.
Moreover, as a student, you have more time.
More time to spend with your family,
your friends,
heck, you even have more friends as a student.
When you get out to work and go separate ways,
your friends leave you one by one.
It's really saddening,
to see close friends drift apart from your life.
Plus, as a single and available guy,
all the more I understand the importance of friends.
Dang, i miss my school days already :(
Any students reading this should totally cherish your time in school.
Trust me, stress in books is nothing compared to stress in life.
(ahhh, why do I feel so old and emo? haha)

hmm,
I've been thinking lately as well,
what kind of a person I am..
(i really have too much time @@)
Conclusion: I don't know ~
haha,
It's really not accurate to think about it yourself,
what I deem mature is seen as naive
(all the time eh? Daniel =.=)
So much so that I don't think anymore about myself,
I just do what feels right :)

dang,
I'm bored,
it's 2 in the morning,
and I don't feel like sleeping.
Pathetically trying to lengthen this post too.
Let's see..hmm...

Ah yes,
another thought of mine:
Ever wonder why stealing is wrong?
After much thought I don't think it is.
You see,
stealing is another form of ensuring one's survival.
It may seem ridiculous,
but looking at animals,
stealing to them is just another form of surviving.
Just because we are "civilised", though we aren't in many ways,
we deem stealing as wrong and punishable.
Adults use their wits and tactically steal positions from others,
but get away with it scot free - ?!?!
There seems to be no logic ~
-pardon me, I'm not emo,
I'm just bored-

hmm..what else have I been thinking about..
ah yes, my single status.
Previously, I've been envious of couples,
and have been trying to get to know more people,
searching for the right one.
But I realised that,
there's a problem lying with me.
It's not about my gender preference (this is for clarity to DANIEL),
I just realise that,
for one,
I don't put all my effort into knowing a girl well.
You see, the dramas I've watched made me understand that,
you have to earn yourself a partner.
And I don't think that I'm that significant in anyone's life,
considering the fact that I'm still not close enough to participate that much.
Naturally, I don't deserve one.
For the other,
the me right now doesn't really feel the need for a partner.
I can pretty much do many things myself,
I don't feel the reliance on the missing half, yet.
I just don't feel the romance, yet.
All I ever want is fun,
and if getting a partner isn't fun,
then I quit :P
haha .

Hear this song and you will know :)
歌名 - 爱不单行
找不到人说心里的寂寞
找不到人懂怕黑的折磨
找不到命中注定在一起的那个人
很多人都像我一个人过生活

爱只有简单笔画
却比想像复杂恨安定爱变化
我爱过几个人也被爱过几遍
却还是没能将幸福留下
爱是不可数的吗
为何我还相信它不是独行侠
我在等一个人在等我的永恒
告诉我爱不单行别害怕

用不完身边泛滥的自由
开始怕孤单是一种诅咒
羡慕我能飞的人为何在天黑以后
还是宁愿回到爱情那个枷锁

爱只有简单笔划
却比想像复杂恨安定爱变化
我爱过几个人也被爱过几遍
却还是没能将幸福留下
爱是不可数的吗
为何我还相信它不是独行侠
我在等一个人在等我的永恒
告诉我爱不单行别害怕

我在等一个人在等我的永恒
告诉我爱不单行
别害怕
我在等一个人在等我的永恒
告诉我爱不单行
相信它

I guess that's the end of my thoughts recently.
As troublesome as it is, and being the lazy me,
I should leave some time and do some packing for army :S
army army army,
that's all there is recently,
dang ~

I don't know how to tell you,
but I do love you more than you think:)
RadicalLove

12 Jan

2010-01-11T08:44:00.000-08:00

Contemplate over this poem:

Osorezan Revoir

All the regrets,
All the memories,
I wish to throw it all away,
even if not forever,
even if not forever.

The pain a thousand years could not relieve,
The pain my heart could not believe,
This is my reprieve,
even if not forever,
even if not forever.

Throw away the empty shell of my existence,
Throw away the last shred of my resistance,
This is my penance,
Even if there is no grave,
even if there is no grave.

Wandering the empty world,
Awaiting a new dawn,
that will never come,
Love is the meeting,
It is the separation,
It's a transparent piece of cloth,
Osorezan Revoir.

The person who holds it all deep within,
Who refuses to let feelings be seen,
You carry your burden deep within,
Even if unfoldable,
even if unfoldable.

In the day,
In the night,
You carry it with you,
even if unfoldable,
even if unfoldable.

Unwavering, Unshaken. Holding pride...
Wanting someone at your side,
Love is the meeting,
The separation,
It's a transparent piece of cloth,
Osorezan Revoir.

The person who waits for you surely,
won't let you have any lonely feelings,
The two together fate brings,
at least.
at least.

The person who waits for you surely,
won't let you have any lonely memories,
The love that fate oversees,
at least,
at least.

Miserable and abandoned on the road,
Halfway through the trip lost all will,
and hope,
Cling to each other still,
Love is the meeting,
The separation.
It's a transparent piece of cloth,
Osorezan revoir.

Though I am unworthy,
It's the joy of supremacy to scatter and spread,
That although I may appear lifeless,
It does not bother me.
So won't you show me a smile or two?

The song that will never become
A tender attachment to the heart,
With this, will come to an end.
What is that place that shines from above?
Love is the meeting,
The separation.
It's a transparent piece of cloth.
Osorezan Re Voir,
Osorezan Au Revoir.

when will it end?
RadicalLove

5 Jan

2010-01-05T07:56:00.000-08:00

class chalet was awesome ~
fun filled, nice balance of SLEEP and FUN
nt like others that screws up the body clock
smoking hot bbq, night cycling, mahjong,
captain balling at siloso, vodka..
tried tonnes of new stuff during the chalet,
nice experiences too :D

ah well 1mth left to go ..
may as well enjoy the rest of it
gotta have more perserverence yo !
glhf dd haha

nights peep~
--------------------------------------------
最近看了一部电视剧《海派甜心》，
剧情十分写实。
根本是抄我的人生吗~
因为爱，林达浪变型成薛海，
我不是一样，变了型？
只是，没人晓，效果和后果不一样。
我连思想也变了，但在爱的这块还是缺一节。
人生不是那么完美的呀。。。
-------------------------------------------

我能重拾那份真情与热情吗？
RadicalLove

29 Dec

2009-12-29T06:11:00.000-08:00

-the only constant thing is change-
it is only now,
that i understand what it means .

i wonder, in the end,
who will be left?
RadicalLove

27 Dec

2009-12-26T11:38:00.001-08:00

life's getting more boring by the day :S
suddenly, studying actually feels so much better than having nothing to do x.x
sigh, someone ask me out !!!
wish i can have more online 'pen-pals' to chat with though,
meeting new people is so..refreshing for the senses :D

i should blog in proper english from now on as well xD
lest some stranger thinks i'm writing alien language haha,
ah well,
shall get to bed,
it's like what? almost 4?

haha,
good night ~!

everyone is just a negligable being,
having negligable dreams,
living in a negligable land .
why go for perfection,
when there is satisfaction?
RadicalLove

20 Dec

2009-12-20T01:35:00.000-08:00

recalling memories,
sharing the past,
digging old photos..

the past can never be brought back,
but it's refreshing to dig them up .

18 years down the road in life,
it's not too long,
but not too short either .
to be able to retain what's pure,
to be able to hold on to what's precious,
to be able to feel regret,
to be able to laugh,
i thank you guys .

may we 40 asses cross paths again,
together .

did i change?
which is me?
the past or the present?
i don't know.
RadicalLove

9 Dec

2009-12-09T23:09:00.000-08:00

eventful day today :D
lotsa stuff happen'in haha

well early in the morning woke up
then zj came to take a look at sis's comp
sun bian fix mine aso
dunno what motherboard de prob i guess

then afternoon went gymming with daniel
from 1440 to 1700
did quite alot of exercises, but didnt feel any ache, strange D:
and i can finally manage a few sets of bench presses alrdy,
after like a few weeks of sessions on balancing that piece of shit -.-
theres one guy w the T-shirt 'infantry'
freaking bulky and came and talk to us,
using a very weird tone,
asking us our age -.-
and our education level -.-
like wth luh ,
then later on saw another bulky guy on the way to hilton hotel
damn funny la and jy say his singlet attire nt suited for orchard style
he din even change his black shirt,
then go to orchard, zai -.-

met up with the few 4A guys and went to hilton
took quite a number of picts, all uploaded on Fb,
so shant waste my time uploading here xD
(lazy la, really=P)
after the pre-prom buffet dinner costing like 50bucks(only)
went to crash the real prom HAHA
w ralph being my tix to prom xD
followed around being each other's photographer haha
took a vid of me doing a short breakdance move too hehe

wanted to go for post prom at first but figured it would be boring
so took a cab home w ralph
the taxi driver was commenting on ralph's indecisiveness haha
and said hes weird hahaha ,
well even he says so haha
reached home at ard 12+

its been fun the whole day
packed with fun and laughter :D
hope it can be that way everyday :DD

off to pack for fri trip :D
bye ~

are you having fun at this time?
RadicalLove

5 Dec

2009-12-05T07:16:00.000-08:00

went cycling with dan,viv and ralph taday~
dan and viv were late for like 30-60min la wth -.-
and viv got lost coming to ecp .. zai .

to pass time,
taught ralph hw to play balek kampung aso haha xD
quite fun .. after not playing for like 1yr++

anyways ,
rented bike at 11..
cycled like 3/4 way to changi village
and it rained zzz
and we cycled back (in the rain)
seems that ive always cycled in the rain dammit -.-

wanted to do some breakdancing but..
oh wells .. the floor was dirty and there were so many ppl ard,
paiseh laaaa hahaha
went on back to the shop and returned the bikes ..
paid extra 3 bucks ): sian
plus i had to buy a 35bucks underwear cuz i didnt bring extra ):
so it was airy during lunchtime -.-
so insecure man .. later my mind strays and ... ER HUM
xD

then dan had to leave..
separated at parkway to buy my briefs and for ralph to drink his soup at MOS
after souping, went to amk hub with viv to catch new moon
THE MOVIE IS NICE WATTTT
why all the negatives?
other than the lack of action,
its nice :D

hmm lets see ..
went to makan at Mac's thereafter and chatted till ard 8+ ?
yeap then bused home :D

first impression of viv hmmm...
high
never stops talking
seems to hide some things, dunno wut
blur
noob
but overall, cute la..
muz praise abit muh,
like 1 out of 10 descriptions LOL

okay ..
off to watch bfb ~
haven watched it for a whole day xD
bye ~

all the conditions in the world don't matter,
when the right one comes along..
RadicalLove

4 Dec

2009-12-04T02:34:00.000-08:00

nt much for today
went gymming with daniel
wasnt that tiring as compared to the other time
my arms dunno why eh,
got muscle MASS
but no STRENGTH .
wth :/
he was laughing that a kid can do heavier weights than me
RAWR
-.-

then took bus 854 back home
and theres this old lady
fucking hell
she smell like crap, seriously .
CRAP .
sour sweat mixed with rotten rubbish
and she spat onto the floor la knn
and then she ate a fucking strong mint candy
so now its,
mint + sweat + rubbish
HOW GREAT
and shes SITTING BESIDE ME
tmd like really
i had to cover my nose to avoid the smell
so unhygienic la zzz
and i couldn't bring myself to tell her
later she spit at me then gg -.-
this kind of commuter..
zz..
FUCK... hmm no..
SCREW... hmm no..
DAMN HER -.- !!!!
rawrrrr
pissed zzz

ah wells,
off to cabal xD
cya .

what's left ?
RadicalLove

3 Dec

2009-12-03T06:26:00.000-08:00

darn darn darn
my legs are immobile
well nt exactly immobile but..
i cant lift my right leg any higher than 30cm :/
gotta run more alrdy luh sigh
used to run 4.8km for sch cross country event
without any problems :/
sighhhhh
need to runnnnnnn

went to queensway today,
bought a pair of black jeans
rather nice but its kinda hugging my thighs
next time my thighs get bigger , gg
ah wells
bored ttm these days,
playing games and doing nuts .
life isnt quite the way i wanted it .
damn .

ah wells ..
cya ~

People are bound to what they believe,
that's what we define reality as .
RadicalLove

2 Dec

2009-12-02T07:57:00.000-08:00

ache ache ache ~~

woke up uber early, 6.33am to be exact
went to run at bedok stadium
ran like 1.6km then cmi
my legs totally numb and head giddy
my legs are immobile now la kaoz .
months of nt moving, like years of paralysis liddat
move abit ache here ache there . tmd .
i still feel so fat la ): rawrrr

anws,
met up with daniel and ralph after lunch
daniel was late so ralph and i went to slack outside a toilet
(wth right?)
and he was actually camwhoring there -.-"
wearing some weird jacket with stars and lightning
totally kuniang i swear .
oh wells , typical ralph HAHA
(dan thought hes gay LOL !)

went to play arcade at bugis,
tried out the gundam game that i was looking forward to,
wasn't as great as i expected cuz i had trouble controlling it
and its uber ex can, 5 bucks per game
ah wells, try for experience :D
but we were spamming a basketball game haha
highest score was 400++ hehe

went to watch 2012 after that
oh pls, so disappointed .
i paid like 6bucks to watch C.G. -.-
a few interesting points to think over and laugh about
1) if the whole world has collapsed, why are cell phones still working?

2) the ships shouldn't be located in china, it should be located in india
-purely because the bangla's are so much more efficient workers
look at the time they take to build towers in singapore . SCARY

3) also china would never let the tibetians into their territory
-politics -.-

4) why the hell will humans wan to let animals on board?
-they will save the space for more humans if they are so -humane-

5) since the south pole is at winconsin,
the sun at the end of the flim shouldnt rise from the direction shown
(aka in the direction of the cape of good hope since they were heading there)
it will rise from somewhere like the sahara desert lor

6) the mission to fix the hydralic system wasnt so unsafe afterall
-they said its a one way trip and theres no space to breathe,
so why can the father and son surface to talk ?

7) the map from charlie wasnt that secret nor that telling
-it opened up and showed CHINA . WOW

8) an avalanche with rocks and snow can crack the glass of the ship,
-then the debri from the tsunami should have crunched the ship alrdy
metal > rock

well, other than these complaints,
its really a rather nice movie
*honest smile (:*

then walked to plaza singapura to dine
and headed home afterwards ~
tmr going out again woots haha
looking forward to the cycling trip aso
hehe

cya ~

what will come, will eventually come .
live life to the fullest and be at peace .
-i love my family(:-
RadicalLove

28 Nov

2009-11-28T06:07:00.001-08:00

phew..
changed skin finally :D
added a few songs too ~

A's are coming to an end
like all other events in life..
JC days are almost over too,
anticipating my army life hehe .

feeling so darn bored during this 1 week break
next week on gna be gym-ing, swimming , running , cycling :D
cant wait for it really xD
and theres also chalets :D
and overseas trip :D
plus plus my buffet treat mwahahaha
woooooooo cant wait :DDDD

2 more days to freeedooommmmmm :D

neither will alone,
nor strength alone,
will be enough .
RadicalLove

11 Nov

2009-11-11T02:01:00.000-08:00

living in my own world of fantasies..

~~you~~
RadicalLove

6 Nov

2009-11-05T08:06:00.000-08:00

4 days left to my battle yo .
hope i can win this .
it's all or nothing .

for whom does the cry weep?
RadicalLove

20 Oct

2009-10-19T09:17:00.000-07:00

everyday is trickling by so slowly,
and my spirit to do work is eroding away as well
2 weeks+ left but it appears that A lvl seems soooo far
when u hate it , time pass so slowly,
when u are enjoying it , time pass so quickly
life sucks seriously .

善男信女
i shouldnt put much hope into this,
-im saying this but im still hoping,
what a hypocrite-
sigh . its always like this , the more hope i have ,
the greater the disappointment .

well, to liven my blog up,
i shall post some picts haha

how many times must i bleed before i understand?
i guess until i find you.
RadicalLove

16 Oct

2009-10-16T04:56:00.000-07:00

why do i keep thinking of it,
knowing that it wont come true?
it's not gonna happen yo .
you think too much .

get real .

trapped in my own fantasy
RadicalLove

15 Oct

2009-10-15T00:38:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time
since i felt adrenaline
pumping so ever ferociously in my blood
and its juz watching a video of Shaq vs Phelps rofl

i still love swimming after all (:
RadicalLove

14 Oct

2009-10-13T23:39:00.000-07:00

Ever have a gaping wound?

You realise that it is there,
but you deny its existence in order to feel better.
Then someone have to come along,
tell you in your face that it IS there,
and still, rub salt in that wound.
Now I can't deny its existence anymore.

It sucks,
to have someone point out the mistake you knew so well.

Pride.
RadicalLove

13 Oct

2009-10-12T21:08:00.000-07:00

感情不是K歌，
音节一字不漏，
不见得感动。

man.. im bored to death studying at home ,
totally no mood to study when the comp is right beside me ):

oh yea hm .
i may be joining a dance sch after A's,
its called Oschool, the breakdance teacher there doesnt look shabby,
the hiphop looks cool too .
but its like 120 bucks for 8 sessions or so .
uber ex luh . maybe i will stick to self learning ~.~
Comments? (hardly anyone reads my post anw ><)

my right arm tricep has been twitching lately ,
dunno why , injury ? idk ~.~
i feel so fat luh , hardly moved at all nowadays ,
mug mug mug , no mood to workout ):
ah, at least dancing takes away some stress and fats xD

im really wishing for A's to be over .
dying to meet up with peeps and do fun stuffs .
(claudia esp , nt forgetting the buffet mwahaha,
still haven tell me ur results yet ~.~)

oh wells , shld get back to doing phy papers ):
cyaz .

今日的大男人，
是不是很难找到爱他的小女人？
郁闷~
RadicalLove

30 Sept

2009-09-30T05:28:00.000-07:00

oh no-s .
this ish gna be another emo post lol
those who arent into philosophy kinda stuff,
pls , turn back . lol .
before u curse me or sth x.x

you have been warned ...
mwahahahaha -lol-

_____________________________

Lately, out of the blue, perhaps due to external influence, I've explored more into the question which I have been pondering over for quite some time. Highly philosophical and it had been much of a turmoil but I have sort of found a personal answer to that.

"What are we born for?"

It's not a weird question really. If the ultimate end for us is death, then why are we born into this world in the first place? I'm not shy to admit, I have a strong sense of thanatophobia which is why I seek the answer to this question, simply to lessen the fear of death and allow me to live my life to the fullest. I have been thinking, is it for the people around I live for, perhaps my loved ones? Or is it for a lifetime of accomplishments? This is a tough one. And, why do I fear death now, will I fear it when I'm near death? These questions were flying all over when I lie to sleep, thinking I might just die in my sleep. Yes, that's how cynical I am lately. (Forgive me, exam stress ._.)

My fear of death originates from a very selfish reason. I just want to live and see the world change and of course enjoy life's pleasures - greed, lust, gluttony, several of the seven sins. Then again, I know death cannot be avoided. But it amuses me how people "overcome" their fear of death sometimes. They use a simple anesthesia called "religion" and numb their fear. I really don't trust in Christ nor Buddism nor Taoism nor any religion at that. "God", if there is one, in my opinion, other than being almighty, shouldn't he/she/it be righteous in the course of action? "God" isn't exactly righteous or so I should say. If he/she/it is, there won't be disasters, illness and all the troubling matters all over the world.

岁月难得沉默秋风厌倦漂泊
夕阳赖着不走挂在墙头舍不得我
昔日伊人耳边话已和潮声向东流
再回首往事也随枫叶一片片落
爱已走到尽头恨也放弃承诺
命运自认幽默想法太多由不得我
壮志凌云几分愁知己难逢几人留
再回首却闻笑传醉梦中
笑谈词穷古痴今狂终成空
刀钝刃乏恩断义绝梦方破
路荒遗滩饱览足迹没人懂
多年望眼欲穿过红尘滚滚我没看透
词嘲墨尽千情万怨英杰愁
曲终人散发花鬓白红颜殁
烛残未觉与日争辉徒消瘦
当泪干血隐狂涌白雪纷飞都成空

This set of lyrics summarises all the worries that I have thought over. Watching your loved ones and close friends turn to fragments of a sea of memories, somehow, the sadness there will actually in one way or another remove part of the fear of death, but not all.
-Whoever don't understand the lyrics can ask me to send you the meaning (:-

But, I will place my trust in one of the sects these days, just to ease the pain of knowing that you will be dead one day.

Now, that's one thing settled. Can't do anything about fear, then I shall maximize my time in this world, I suppose. Hmm, what's the reason for me being born then? If death awaits, then won't it be better to die upon birth before we develop a fear for death? Man, "God" is kind. The answer I found is easy and actually strings up what I have mentioned thus far.

"Existence"

To prove that there was a Ben Ang in this world. To prove that he had lived and done something. To prove my existence ten, hundred, heck, even millions down the road. To be remembered. That's what I hope to achieve. The answer is right in front of me really. Why do I feel sad when my loved ones and friends leave? Why would I drink to savour those memories with them when they are gone? Existence comes with company. When there are people who acknowledge your existence, you have something called the "will to live". When you lose them, it would seem that you have lost everything. This is my belief. That everyone live, in an attempt to leave even a trace of their existence behind.

It may only be me, as one who have never gone through the stage of romance, who crave to have a soulmate and as one who have been told of his latent potential and a bright future ahead of him. My existence is sort of "imperative" to people as I perceive it. And this is why I will strive hard now, to prove my existence someday, and not be forgotten as another being that has come to be.

This is my answer. Have you found yours?

"God" bless.
RadicalLove

23 Sept

2009-09-23T08:00:00.000-07:00

my abstinence plan failed miserably .
everyday i will use the comp for at least an hour .
sigh . totally fucked .
studying has never been much of a chore till now .
all i feel is regret after every paper .
regret for not preparing , regret for not being sharp during the paper etc

-Brick walls are there to show how dedicated you are-
i dont think im dedicated enough .

the allure of the comp is too much .
can't blame me .
i really wish my someone can burn this hard-disk,
-maybe my mom-
and magically make it reappear after my A's
i want my subjects to get As,
but i dont think i want it bad enough

and my pimples are popping all over .
fuck it . i feel screwed all over .
been down with flu at a bad time too .
triple fuck .
i just want this part of my life to be over ASAP
ive never been so mindful abt my results ever .
elitism is starting to get the better of me .
sighz .

i want to regain my freedom ~
i want to swim ~
i want to bodybuild ~
i want to play games ~
i want to watch my shows ~
i want to dance ~
i want to catch up with my friends ~
i want to meet up with new friends ~
i want to learn driving ~
i want to learn roller skating ~
i want to learn ice skating ~
i want to read my mangas ~
i want to buy more hip clothes ~

I fucking want my As.

29 Jul

2009-07-29T02:40:00.000-07:00

on hiatus .
shall try my best
to practise abstinence
(from comp la :/ duh)

im slowly regaining my thirst ,
the thirst to stand at the top .
please let me ,
see this through to the end ...
RadicalLove

28 Jul

2009-07-28T06:46:00.000-07:00

end of a long weekend from sat ~
tuesday blues . dammit ._.
the day of the a lvls getting nearer ,
tmd , getting more stressed by the day .
few weeks ago i said i wasnt,
now i am after seeing the kind of results i get for CT
sigh -.-

got woken up at 5.30 T.T
[the bed was SO NICE to sleep aww]
went to sch and wtf ,
no benches -.- stupid staff ,
never put back after college day zzz
then Tan call us go bring the bench from the basketball court .
and there was a big jam la -.-
u noe the bench is so freaking heavy ,
i carried one and was like stalling along the way
when i carried to the table ,
my hand wanna BREAK alrdy can -.-

and haha ,
heard that taiwan xchg students are joining us this week
got bei3 yi1 nu3 haha . the only sch i remember
cuz they are like raffles girls in singapore lol
heard abt them alot on taiwan variety shows ><
alot abt them being nerds...
and how the girls wore those long skirts
and pull them short after the D.M. walked away haha
and and , their socks are like wtf imba high ,
like gna go play soccer liddat rofl .
still remember last yr our senior shanon fake as taiwan student
and joined us on our first day of sch XD

X.X
sigh , i feel so fat ._.
feeling so insecure abt my abs lol
dan say short ppl only have 6 packs
WHY AM I SO SHORT KNS -.-
well at least my chest is getting fit
been doing exercises after lunch nowadays hehe .
xD whee ~

>_<
i seem to be making ppl angry all the time luh ._.
like i always step on their boobytraps and landmines
rawrrrrr . stoopids ~.~
thank gawd u forgave me X.X
but i mean no harm la horh :3
im juz trying to be friendly and joke x3
soooowwwwiiieeeee
>_<

- why cant i change font w blogger? D: -

you cant sit around and watch all the people have fun in the water ,
eventually you have to learn and grow fins and dive in .
RadicalLove

20 Jul

2009-07-20T08:10:00.001-07:00

《不诗》

不晓，不了，不解。
不愿，不屑，不想。
过去，现在，不可能。

15 Jul

2009-07-15T05:04:00.000-07:00

muscle aches are okay :D
woooo :D
but my results suck . bah .

went to catch ice age 3 today .
3D too .
was kinda .. nt wat i expected ,
it being my first 3D movie and all .
3D is kinda .. hmm ..
2D ? LOL .
movie plot was nice ,
graphic was nice haha
the jokes were too xD

17 weeks ..
sigh .
pressure is coming on man ..
sucks .
rawr .

i dont get it
why are u all trying so hard,
when, here ,
im trying so hard
to avoid thinking abt it
reminders of the past
brings up memories
and also conflicting emotions
i dont want to guess
and i dont want to face it
cuz after all,
wishes on a star..
dont come true,
just like in the movies .
like u said .

RadicalLove

11 July

2009-07-10T10:11:00.000-07:00

CTs are over !
Woo !
GP - DIE
Phy - DIE
Chem - DIE x 10000000
Maths - DIE
Econs - DIE
string of deaths . nt bad .
lol .
felt super bad after each and every paper .
dammit .

well i should start doing sth abt my studies .
and i will (:
motivation's coming (:
i can feel it ~
muahahahaha

what do you think you are doing ?
you think everything ends there ?
a simple sms or an email perhaps ?
you think love is a child's game, is that it ?
what you have done . i cannot condone .
i never knew that you felt that way deep within .
i have a completely different view of you now .
you, do not deserved to be loved ,
not now , not ever .
i was told i always look on the good side of people ,
but now , you will be the first person i put on my blacklist .
the first person that i will learn to hate .

you do not understand,
what love is .
RadicalLove

1 Jul

2009-07-01T07:31:00.000-07:00

1st week of sch is ending ~
CT2 is starting ~
but wtf ?
im still in holiday mood .
GG .

did nth much this week,
i juz feel so aimless nowadays,
no motivation to mug
i juz dunno much abt my own future,
like wat course im taking in uni,
wat qualifications i need
keep telling myself that the better scores i get,
the more choices i have,
but it doesnt seem to motivate me that much .
sigh ...
all these mugging,
i wonder if its worthwhile ._.
frankly,
i don worry abt my future at all,
i juz need my 3 meals and a source of entertainment,
tats enuff haha .
but its a mentality of mine,
to work hard for my family in future
to provide them with everything
but , right now ,
i dun even have a girlfren,
like wth . talk abt family ,
hw to get motivated sia .
wat shitzzzzzzz .
someone talk to me and motivate me rawrrrr

ive been thinking abt NS alot yea
i wish i can get in sooner
but haha , dan and xinhao says
now u wan get in sooner,
but u wish u can get out sooner also.
haha . i donno ,
i juz look forward to the disciplined life in NS haha .
negative points of NS ? the bald head LOL .
though i was bald before ._.

oh ,
and erm i broke my blister while doing pullups ,
damn zai right ._.
my left hand was crippled for one day .
and im out of commission for pullups for another 3 days .
nOoOooooo . juz when i think im getting bulker T.T
at least my arms are enlarging ,
chest ? ganbatte

it seems that you have chosen silence,
not looking back at all.
well, it's fine with me anyway.
but, i'm very sad;
sad that i have lost such a close friend.
those times we shared,
i will never forget them.
you made me realise who i am,
you made me realise who i need,
most importantly,
you have given me a feeling of love;
no matter how short it lasted,
no matter how true it felt,
it was the first time in my life,
that i knew what it is like to be loved.
you may or may not be reading this,
you may or may not care what i am writing,
but all i want to say is,
you were a close friend of mine.
it seems that you are distancing yourself,
but,
it's okay.
i will treat you like the rest of my friends,
but we will never be as close as before.
-wishes on a shooting star, don't come true, not for me-

the curtain has finally closed;
who will lift it up for me to perform again?
RadicalLove

27 June

2009-06-27T08:22:00.000-07:00

NEFMQ today ~~
woke up like uber early
went to sch
had to sign in at the gate
signing process was damn dumb,
purpose of visit : take bus ._.

oh wells ,
bused to NUS ,
slacked awhile before going in .
the quiz was freaking tough .
and out of 13 schs and dunno hw many teams ,
only 4 teams can get into finals .
wasnt hoping much anyways ,
juz going there to have fun and fill T3A lol .
expected that Su Ann's and Kai Zhong's grp get in ,
their academics are like imba @.@

well ,
overall RJ 1st
DHS 2nd
VJ 3rd
RJ damn arrogant la ,
name emself TTWW,
Team That Will Win,
then get 1st ,
really bo whey gong .
knstmdknnccbomgwtfbbq
like wth laaaaa zzzzz

anw haha ,
my Team VJC012 ,
all from swimming haha ,
mini outing to NUS xD

Presenting VJC012 :D

my hair looks like the hairstyle in the 70's meh
no what ...

i feel aimless ,
so suddenly .
RadicalLove

--------------------------------

Fion: zai la . i wan do ur quiz ur blog cannot right click -.-

21 Jun

2009-06-21T07:37:00.000-07:00

woke up rather early in the morning, 9+
ate lunch and went to meet IRC peeps,
dan, kenneth.c, binghan(forgot lol =x)
went to amk to meet em and psps xD
i was late for like 30min haha .
dan brought apple strudel back from aust,
pretty nice . but we doubted if theres added stuff x.x
(hope not; he had alot of time on the plane ~.~)

went to play @ the arcade cuz movie time was rather late
and wth , the lady gave me a PINK tapz card .
of all the colors , BRIGHT PINK . dammit =.=
at least gimme blue or silver luhh >_>
i so manly gimme BRIGHT pink . tsk .
oh wells . went to play the b-ball game,
and kenneth went to advance his score on some driving game
we also had a go at the... erm..wat u call it
'~~punch?~~ ~~spam?~~RAM-the-button-machine'
play until me and minghao's palm both red lol
dan was first to die , then minghao , then me
hahaha . I WIN :D

thn went to queue for drinks aft getting tix,
while dan gets his toilet water haha ;x
(god knows wat else he does in the toilet,
right dan ? xP)
caught terminator,
wasnt too bad, plot was normal,
but the graphics was good .
and this stupid guy sit beside me,
super scaredy cat .
i practically had a chair vibrator attached to me
every scene which had a minor scare,
he jerked the frigging chair =.=
some parts he even cover his face in reflex .
i mean c'mon la . its nt even a horror movie -.-

after movie-ing was,
'meet Benjamin's friend at compass point' plan
or tats wat dan told xinhao
that plan failed utterly ,
cuz my fren Liyi din turn up for work
so failed to deesiao her xP
saw her fren Fion though haha
i din it was Fion till dan told me,
(dan is very observant HAHA)
wanted to deesiao her in place of Liyi,
but oh wells , we let her off haha
nxt time man , i will catch u someday .
and u live so friggin far can . sengkang =.="
like wth . haven even meet up since ive known u x.x
no fate ~ rawrrrr ~

went to chill at the arcade at compass point
(walked there like unknowingly ._.)
watched dan and binghan play a game of air hockey
dan OWNED him 7-2 hahaha

gave kenneth my card for him to play his driving game
(see i so good xD)
and saw this kid, super engrossed in the candy machine game
the hole like so darn full of sweets and hes still playing
he had like 24bucks in the friggin card,
dunno hw much he had left in the end,
we left the arcade he was still playing -.-

thn went to serangoon de chomp chomp
suggested by kenneth TAN who FLY OUR PLANE
(okay sounds very wrong)
who PANGSEH us ._.
walked all the way from the friggin MRT station
SO DAMN LONG CAN =.="
and chomp chomp was a hawker centre,
NO AIR CON RAWRRRRR
and we crapped racist jokes on the way there haha x.x
met up with xinhao ,
ordered sugar cane (like omgwtfbbq, its a JUG, $2.50)
bbq chicken (peeled away the skin as usual)
carrot cake (white)
kuay tiao (hopefully dun get Hepatitis A ._.)
hokkien mee <3

aft dinner went to SEE kenneth tan
and then trained back home ._.
super shag can ._.

and OMG, one week left .
like so many things haven mug
insecure abt phy and econs
and maths and chem
and GP
tats everything btw ._.

i think i shall read my time mag
and get to sleep
tmr i shall mug
TO THE EXTREME
(quote from Sasagawa Ryōhei)

everyone deserves a second chance
RadicalLove

11 Jun

2009-06-11T00:06:00.000-07:00

back from training in the morning x.x
super slack la like wth .
nvr even do land exercise . zai man
but at least i did my 10 sets of 5 pullups haha
gym nt open lorrr like zzzz . i wanted to buff more ._.
grrrrr . oh wells

1mth more before i know my Pes allocation
Pes A plssssssssss x.x stupid blood test

heres a nice MV i saw
and Genie is my new idol :DD
her songs are sweet and she herself looks sweet haha
enjoy (:

so...
RadicalLove

7 Jun

2009-06-07T06:02:00.000-07:00

been awhile since ive blogged on daily activity (~OO~)
sry la . lazy ma x.x

1 Jun

NEFMQ briefing is zzz .
a total waste of time .
econs dept alrdy gave us all th notes
and they juz went thru em again
like wholesale ?! wth . nt even slight content change
sheena left aft lunch lol . cuz too sian
and we ended up playing a word game on her iphone haha

darn stupid la,
i think juz cause im active on the NEFMQ blog
then mr lee go appoint me as leader for like er
group 6 - 12 and im supposed to remind em to do things .
nt like they read their email anyway
so lil ppl frm vj turn up for the briefing ._.
really hope i get into finals haha
econs ROCKS :3

3 Jun

th workshop was fun
th speaker is darn funny,
talk abt his pen pal date
and th stack of papers of questions rofl
lucky my net frens arent liddat LOL .

and and i learnt the shape of my face .
curved and oval ,
juz like tony liang >.<>

6-7 Jun

parents went KL over the weekend,
attend some talk or some seminar
thn left me and my sis at home
(which we spent almost the entire 2 day out really)
went to eat a buffet at Sukiyaki @ Cine
ate for a whole 2 hrs lol .
and her bf was like super picky with the food .
haha

ohohoh ! and i got my first crumpler bag
:DDDDDD
been wanting to get it for a long time .
i got the yellow / black striped color
(weiliang's and teck boon's type)
ran out of red / white series . sigh .
the red white one is nicer lor . kaoz
cost 183 bucks (ex man~!~!~!)
but oh wells, crumplers last a long long time
like few years , <3 it haha

my sis and her bf bought a Wii,
after going up and down Queensway
(i hate ulu buildings, they reek of a smell ._.)
360 bucks in total, pretty cheap alrdy
so spent ystd night and today playing haha
got this dragonball game which is like darn fun,
have to do the action itself LOL
so my sis bf play until like O_O
hahahahaha darn funny la
do kamekameha wave LOLOLOL
took a pict with my phone but like wtf ,
cannot transfer onto comp
$%!@#^!@%^%^
lost the freaking cable =.="

and tmr is my NS medical checkup
with a stupid 3hr aptitude test
gna stone man =.=" so freaking long
hope i get into Pes A/B
hehe .
OCS ! i want to get in haha .

and thats all folks for June thus far .
i shld blog more on my daily stuff .
hmm hmm
see who wins the battle,
the lazy me or the hyper me lol

hw heavy am i,
in that heart of urs ?
RadicalLove

30 May

2009-05-30T05:04:00.000-07:00

Work Schedule:
1 Jun (Mon) - NEFMQ briefing @ NUS School of Business [10am - 4pm]
2 Jun (Tues) - Chemistry Class Makeup @ VJC [10am]
3 Jun (Wed) - Interview Workshop @ VJC [9.15am - 4pm] $40
8 Jun (Mon) - NS Checkup + aptitude test [1.30pm]
22 Jun (Mon) - Deadline for NEFMQ Online Quiz

last week of June - CT2 ~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!

15 Jul (Wed) - Dialogue with Minister of State [3pm - 4.30pm]
20 Jul (Mon) - Dateline for registration of Nanyang Concept Tests $10 each

1 Aug (Sat) - Nanyang Concept Test @ VJC (Phy) [Morning]
1 Aug (Sat) - Nanyang Concept Test @VJC (Chem) [Afternoon]

29 Fri

2009-05-29T03:59:00.000-07:00

why am i concerned over such stuff mancxz .
ive lost myself over stupid things ._.
grrr . stupid .

i suck big time .
from this point forth,
i start afresh :3

hello ~
RadicalLove

27 May

2009-05-27T06:33:00.000-07:00

destress day today (:
SAD day haha .

shouted my lungs out for the first time in my life
(must have scared u harry xP)
but, i feel really refreshed after today .

why don't want to talk to me ):

hoping from the bottom of my heart,
that wishes upon a shooting star,
do come true .
RadicalLove

26 May

2009-05-25T18:43:00.000-07:00

full day today,
came home directly after.
just me and the four walls of my room
plus the stockplie of work lying on my table
grumbling out to me to do them

why cant i have a break
im terribly stressed
but no one seems to see that
my shoulders feel so heavy
cant someone help with the load..
i dun feel happy at all nowadays,
nt one bit .

i just need a break,
timeout, with those really nice frens
i miss those times at IRC outings
where we can discuss abt anything under the sun
and especially my first net fren (drum roll)
Claudia Chan J** L*** (i bet u think i forgot ur full name ><)
Edwin too.
really miss those fun times.

sometimes,
i just want to spend more time with u,
but there never seems to be chances to.
i dun like this,
not one bit.

-stressed-

what good is time,
when i cant spend it with the person i want
RadicalLove

22 May

2009-05-22T11:01:00.001-07:00

for the first time in my life,
i'm happy.
i'm never letting go.
never.
(:

until someone says so..
RadicalLove

21 May

2009-05-21T04:37:00.000-07:00

pleh enoemos
lufniap os ti si yhw
eromyna kniht ot tahw aedi on

RadicalLove

20 May

2009-05-20T00:18:00.000-07:00

低落时，
每一首情歌都特别有感触。。
-------------------------------
原来。。。
原來最疼痛的表情竟是沒有情緒,
原來最殘忍的畫面可以甜言蜜語

心雨。。。
心裡的雨傾盆而下
也沾不濕她的髮
淚暈開明信片上的牽掛
那傷心原來沒有時差

安静了。。。
你害怕幸福短暫一秒就崩落
分開是一種解脫
讓你好好的想過
沉默是我最後溫柔
是因為我太愛你

最后的风度。。。
我最喜欢挑战孤独
我也爱放下包袱
没有谁
我也不舍得哭

好朋友。。。
像
两首节拍不同的歌，
却又同时被爱情合奏，
旋律勉强着。
愉快不能够假装快乐，
你心中有宽阔的天空，
但空气好稀薄。
曾经等待因为会改变什么，
你总会属于我，
但是最后时间证明了，
你只喜欢我。
你说我比较像你的好朋友，
只是不小心拥抱着。
你道歉，你难过
于是我给你笑容，
谁在乎我的心，还会不会寂寞。

如果爱情是五线谱，
我只希望用全音符，
吟唱出，爱上你
那完整的幸福。
当你的心，没有耳朵
即使我，为你唱这歌
你也只，看见我哭了。

你说我比较像你的好朋友，
只是不小心拥抱着。
你道歉，你难过
于是我给你笑容，
谁在乎我的心还会不会寂寞。
-------------------------------
首首情歌，
在脑海里漂浮着，
美好的回忆，
重复的在眼前播放，
但一切永远是个梦。

你不在我身边，你一样快乐，
你不在我身边，你不会难过。
我给你的幸福，其他能给更多。
就让这一切慢慢地淡去。。
把我从记忆里删除。。

放心，
我会尽全力，
不让自己出现在你眼前。

无言的结局，
希望你快乐。

i loved you with a fire red ..
now its turning blue ..
RadicalLove

19 May

2009-05-19T07:07:00.000-07:00

表面看似坚强，
事实上，
轻易地就能撕破。

缭乱的心情，
缭乱的思绪，
我不想再有。
我已经付出了一切。
不知如何面对你，
不知以什么眼光看你，
不知以什么心态与你对话。

没权利，
没资格。
我凭什么，
凭什么要求你给我答案。
我什么都不是。
从头到尾，
可能，
只是我一个，
自作多情。

好痛苦，
好痛苦。
哭泣又有谁知，
难过又有谁晓。

RadicalLove

16 May

2009-05-16T07:02:00.000-07:00

having doubts all over again .
i feel like im running around in circles
getting nothing done at all .
serious deja vu .

when and where,
will i ever find my answer
RadicalLove

14 May

2009-05-14T07:05:00.000-07:00

can i just get a life of my own .
fuck man .

trying to picture,
picture a clear image of me and you
down the road from here .
RadicalLove

12 May

2009-05-11T14:52:00.000-07:00

how many times
must i go through this

i guess this is the price to pay

closing an eye,
just seems to get harder each time.
RadicalLove

5 May

2009-05-05T01:23:00.000-07:00

Since when was it,
that i learned to rely on ppl,
Since when was it,
the illusions started,
Since when was it,
i became so weak.

I should have realised it
'friends' clouded my vision
'friends' pulled me away from solitude
'friends' made me weak.

I should have realised it
when im alone,
im nt afraid
when im alone,
i dun look for help
when im alone,
i dun find excuses
when im alone,
im the strongest.

The ability to solve my own problems
The ability to take it all on
The ability to overcome obstacles
I want it back.

All those stuff I said before,
it was all a fuckload of crap.
Expectations of ppl to stand by me
Expectations of ppl to be proud of me
Expectations of ppl to look up to me
Expectations of ppl to rely on me
What a bunch of shit.
All I ever needed was me,
me and me only,
I should never have expected much from others.

Weakling, crawl back to ur cell,
wait for that someone to break you out.
Until then,
I'm taking control.

Wake up,
dreams over.
There is nothing for u in the first place
nothing
void
emptiness
Get back to the fucking reality.

Friends.
Who needs them?

-無-

pulled back from the abyss
hw long will i be out this time ?

RadicalLove

3 May

2009-05-03T07:35:00.000-07:00

tired ..
missing swimming already ..
nats felt like it was just yesterday ..
the joy of reaching 30s ..

stop thinking about it
you don't deserve what you want
there was never a place for you in the first place
soledad is the only place for you

finding a reason to be passionate again
RadicalLove

1 May

2009-05-01T01:24:00.000-07:00

took this personality quiz out of boredom
and here are the results
(which i think is quite true)

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education
You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

strange how this coincides with my recent thoughts
i've been there for many ppl,
but,
i wonder who will be there for me?
at the end of the day,
all i have is me..
feeling proud,
happy,
angry,
sad,
no one to share emotions with..
maturity and independence,
i paid a high price for them..
RadicalLove

29 Apr

2009-04-29T08:28:00.000-07:00

it's finally over .
i've reached my final destination .. (':

50free - 30.81s

15 seconds off my timing from last yr ..
the best 15seconds of my life ..
adrenaline level is now zero ..
i guess i will never experience it again
the heart pumping action,
the anxiety, the excitement,
and the joy of finishing an event .
i would give everything just to experience the past year again

but for now,
im really, really tired .
one year of hard work
one year of passion
one year of determination
one year of sweat, tears and blood .
i need a break .
a really long one .

"If no one was watching,
would you put in your best?"
Me ?
sorry . no can do .

Swimming. I love this sport. More so when I joined VJC swim team. I've learnt so much over the past year.

From the time I made new buddies, Ryan, Ralph, Harry to the time I got bullied by the juniors, Pam and Siok Hui, from the time Shao Sheng wanted to reject me from the team, to the time I got my desired position in a relay event, from the time my goggles came off during every plunge, to the time a single plunge took me 10m far, from the time I was gymming alone, to the time I had my teammates with me at gym trainings, from the time my PB was 45s, to the time my timing is 30s, I loved every single moment of it.

Jiao Lian's words are still resounding in my head as if it was just yesterday. “Ban De Min! 脚踢快一点！” ， “Free 转身的时候腰不要晃，肩转就好。” ，“呼吸的时候动作快一点，别慢吞吞的！” ，“Free pulling 要到大腿，不要停在腰那里。” ，“Ban De Min, tumbleturn 的时候，动作快点，别在原地打转。”，“Plunging 的时候，脚要做dolphin kick，头要在手臂之下。”，“喂，Ban De Min, 今天脚怎么没在踢？累啦哈？”

“教练，谢谢您这一年的训练，把我调教成一个自由泳的选手。您的每一句话，我是无时无刻都紧紧地听着，遵从着。要对您说的话，一句谢谢是不足以表达我内心深处的感激。希望你能继续为维多利亚处级学院努力，培养出更多选手。后会有期。。”

The time and effort I put into swimming, I don't regret every single decision along the way. Swimming has provided me an escapade from my social solitude, the only time where I really let down every single one of my protective barriers. For swimming and my team, I'm willing to go to great lengths. The passion I have, I wonder how many people felt it. All the fun times, hard times are nothing but pleasant memories. I'm already feeling emptiness, adrenaline no longer pumps through me when I picture myself sprinting for 50m. I really miss the feeling....

VJ Swim Team. Thanks for everything you have given me. It's time to pass the baton on to the juniors...

Nil Sine Labore, have I defined it well?

-the water is my sky-
RadicalLove

28 Apr

2009-04-28T06:44:00.000-07:00

好累好累。。
总是得不到我要的结果。
把一切都交给命运吧。

等待着被爱的滋味。。

thanks for opening my eyes
and letting me see what's important.
RadicalLove

25 Apr

2009-04-25T01:59:00.000-07:00

100m freestyle - 1:15:14

dying to break my own limits .
i really hope i can break it .
30s

this is as far as i will go .
决定不说了。
RadicalLove

23 Apr

2009-04-23T06:10:00.000-07:00

disappointments & regrets .

17th placing - 2:53
got subbed out for medley relay .

mulling over the course of my swimming sucks
why didnt i pull more in that stroke
why didnt i kick harder in each kick
why didnt i keep each breath longer
why didnt i breathe lesser
why why why
so many whys unanswered

really glad for the team with such nice results
i had wanted so bad to get into the relay team . so bad .
i guess it was never meant to be .

well its all over now .
tomorrow's the last event for me .
i think .

mixed feelings .
RadicalLove

23 Apr

2009-04-22T17:50:00.000-07:00

after 1 year of hard work .
it all comes down to this .

RadicalLove

9 Apr

2009-04-09T08:36:00.001-07:00

PW:
A

im not happy at all not one bit .

clenching my fists,
i can only move onward
while enduring the pain.
RadicalLove

30 Mar

2009-03-30T05:49:00.000-07:00

PCME:
ECDE

fuck it.

无奈。
RadicalLove

24 Mar

2009-03-24T05:20:00.000-07:00

始终，
只有我一个。

RadicalLove

19 Mar

2009-03-19T05:20:00.000-07:00

也许，
到最后，
只是我一个。
RadicalLove

16 March

2009-03-16T08:02:00.000-07:00

tired from the inter JC swimming comp .
had a very satisfying time today .

addicted to adrenaline .
RadicalLove

14 March

2009-03-13T06:17:00.000-07:00

blog time .
haha CTs finally over .
got some time on my hands . ^^

VOG - Victorian Olympic Games aka Sports Day 2009

BORED TO DEATH .
din sign up for any games cuz in the afternoon theres training .
then dun wanna shag myself .
the only thing i liked was the cheerleading though haha .
though my house got last but .. oh well ~

Some picts from the cheers :)

Winner : Lynx (:

My house Aquila ~

I promised my junior i will post her unglam pict x)

Flying picts ^^

Stunts ~

oh haha , random pict of the day xD

DONE .

tired ~
hope that my remaining dreams will come true
RadicalLove

13 March

2009-03-12T01:03:00.000-07:00

find myself emoing alot nowadays . . .
why ?

RadicalLove

9 March

2009-03-08T07:33:00.000-07:00

10 more hours till the start .
5 days more till the end .

hurry ,
i cant wait to move on .
there are so many things ,
so many things waiting to be done .

RadicalLove

28 Feb

2009-02-27T05:41:00.000-08:00

看着你皱着眉头，
望橱窗外，似乎在深思，
眼神带有悲伤。
此刻的我，瞧了你的模样，
心情也不断的起伏。

话题少了，
问题多了。
你我之间好像。。
好像有很多障碍
等着我去克服。

我疲惫了，
疲惫的不是身子，
而是心灵。

为什么？！

我觉得自己很没用。
无法将你那紧紧锁住的眉头解开，
似乎带给你更多麻烦。
若是如此，
我宁愿永远也不要出现在你的生活里。

就这样，
我们之间的沉默，
由窗外的风景填满。。

我不想，
不想这样就结束。
RadicalLove

24 Feb

2009-02-23T05:59:00.000-08:00

Driving down the street,
where my old apartment used to be,
memories of the past came back .

the fun i had,
the tears i shed,
the pain i endured,
it is all in the past .

But,
the future's a big unknown .
i wish for my friends to never leave my side,
i wish for time to slow down,
just that little bit,
to savour the remaining time i have left in school.

And most importantly,
i wish for you to be part of my life,
here, now and the future .

I will wait .

RadicalLove

21 Feb

2009-02-20T04:52:00.000-08:00

Emo-ing over minor things ,
But,
do you know that it hurts ?
RadicalLove

15 Feb

2009-02-15T06:30:00.001-08:00

"I Wanna Be"

[Intro:]

[Sigh] Look. I know we've been friends for a while now.

But, I just feel like I can confess to you.

It's gonna be hard but.

Alright here it goes...

[Verse 1:]

Imagine that the pillow that you cried on was my chest,

and the tissue that you wiped your face with was my hand.

Girl, imagine: if you needed advise about some other guy, I'm the one that comes to mind.

Not tryna hear you tell nobody that I'm just a friend,

just trying to make sure I'm that body that you call your man,

and anytime you need a shoulder -- it's yours, night or day,

but what I'm tryna say is, I wanna be...

[Chorus:]

The last number you call late at night (said I wanna be),

The first one that you dial when you open your eyes.

Wanna be the one you run to,

wanna be the one that ain't gonna hurt you,

I wanna be yeah, I wanna be yeah..

Be the man making your girl jealous,

be the guy shuttin' down all the fellas..

whatever you need, girl, it's all on me:

soldier, your friend or your lover, girl,

I wanna be...

[Verse 2:]

Would it be cool?

Would you mind if I called you my boo,

what if the next whip you was pushin' was the one I bought for you?

Can I be the one that meets your pops and take your mama shoppin', be the only one they like?

Have you thought about it -- wait -- really thought about it?

Maybe you should take some time

call your girls and talk about it, yeah.

'cause I done already made up my mind,

don't need no more time to know if I wanna be with you,

I wanna be...

[Chorus]

[Verse 3:]

Put me on your screen saver, all over your myspace and make me one of your top favorites,

that's where I wanna be...

The one you cryin' for (stand up for and fightin' for)

wanna be your good, bad, love, hate girl..

[Chorus]

[x2]

Cross my heart hoped to die, on everything that's good,

I'm gonna do you right, show you right, get this understood.

[Chorus]

Girl I wanna be, I wanna be.... [sigh]

I wanna be, I wanna be...

Everything i do for you,
is worth my every sweat and blood .
RadicalLove

6 Feb

2009-02-07T17:55:00.000-08:00

yesyes
im finally blogging .
couldnt find the time to for the past week >.<

Sea Regetta - Orientation09
went to sch at the usual timing today
chatted with the 4A guys and we played with my cam

haha . an emo pict of Tan imba =P

met up with swimmers after assembly and went to ECP
yeap, the VJC swim team is acting as lifeguards for the biathlon
(:
there was a briefing for the route by grandma Goh
(it was supposed to be a briefing,
but he just had to make things confusing)

Briefing by HnF members

[The briefing would be fine if the HnF was to do it,
seriously]

Samuel our J1 swimmer taking part in Biathlon

well quite obviously,
Samuel came in first place for the swimming section (:

sad thing , Ryan and Ralph were chosen as the special ones
to be road marshals and nt lifeguards . HAHA .

Leaving for road marshalling duty . Awww...

the biathlon was quite dumb really ,
the swim route was supposed to be 200m ,
but it looks like its ard 100m -.-
like wth , its a biathlon for god damn sake .
running route is like 4km ? zzz
so unfair to the swim sport . grr .

went to cycle with Ryan and Ralph after duty .
cycled for 2hrs from ECP to Mr Tea at SMU and back

@ the bridge

Ryan and me (funny face haha)

Ryan and Ralph

went back to ecp , took a short break from cycling
and mass danced with yumin and her PA fren .
i swear we look like lost sheeps during dance lol .
went back to sch and took a bath ,
lucky i booked a cubicle early keke ,
if not no space to bathe de sia ,
J1s and the OGLs all chiong after dismissal . omg .

waited for yumin awhile and bused / trained to city hall
had tea (or lunir according to chong wai) at the food court @ M.Sq
caught the movie 'The Wedding Game'
i shall nt spoil it for anyone who wanna go watch
but i will give it a 3/5 rating =x

yumin had a meeting with her PA frens at suntec mac
so we walked (and got lost finding the M)
took like 20-30min finding it LOL .
her PA crew ppl are friendly and they are nice (:
didnt take a pict with em so couldnt post up here =(
i screwed up my pict with yumin by making a funny face grrr .
lol . acting cute attempt *FAILED*
i shall nt embarass myself and post that pict =\

after that the group of us went for the mass dance at the fountain
the freaking dance took damn long cuz of the interval songs .
like wth .
10-15 min of interval between each song -.-
the J1s went to run round and round The Ring
doing funny cheers and random shoutings haha .

The Fountain

The crowd of J1s

Funny games played by J1s

yumin had to leave early cuz her dad was here
so i lompang-ed her dad's car to the nearest MRT stat
Thanks (:

reached home at ard 10 ,
completely shagged haha .
but it was fun though .
met new frens ,
improved old bonds .
fruitful day
(:

[sorry if i missed out any details
its like 2 days since the event
and my brain memory sucks . =x]

不会照顾自己的话，
就让我来照顾你。
RadicalLove

31 Jan

2009-01-30T08:44:00.000-08:00

New Skin,
New Start.

all i can do is say,
-Thanks-
for now . . .
Radicallove

23 Jan

2009-01-23T02:17:00.000-08:00

long time no see !
abit of stuff to blog but gonna cut long story short :D

been chionging intensive training(no thanks to samuel)
and chionging tutorials as well .
my steam went out for my tutorials in like 2 weeks
cuz i caught up with the lecturer .
haha .

im nursing 2 minor injuries nowz .
one in the rib muscles and one is an overworked left thigh .
damn stupid man =\
grab pull buoy also can rub my ribs against the metal plate at the pool
and cause a bruise / muscle tear at my rib muscles . wtf .
dumb .
hopefully it can heal in time to get back to training :\

hmm okay today :D
Chinese New Year Celebrations
had lecture in the morning followed by the niu year celebrations
(sucks right , niu year celebration also muz have lessons . grr .)
then was a series of performances by CO , dance etc etc .
and there was .... MASS DANCE .
which i did not take part haha .
i will in time ~ at the sea regetta .
i made a deal with my fren to do it tgt lol .
cuz we 2 dunno the dance that well and look like clowns when dancing LOL .

Mass Dance - can see the leads at the roof ?

hmm of cuz we also had the lao yusheng part
and we invited our CT Mr Kwok haha .
we also dedicated a message to him via the MC .
abit de shameless but here it is :

From Guys of 08S44:
We wish for your son to grow up to be as handsome as us .

LOL .

laoing yusheng . there was more yusheng on the table than in the bowl
LOL .

hmhm .
oh yea .
then had a meeting with the swimming peepo
(me , harry and samuel , the pathetic 3... AGAIN)
brainstormed on the ideas for orientation de walkabout etc .
thn went to lunch with the 4A guys .
didnt get to see the VS teachers ): awwww

wanted to go to shi wei's house to mahjong but he nt home so ~
bus-ed to bedok inter and detoured to macs to get an ice cream
(thanks weiliang for the treat xD)
and walked all the way to kemangan (wateva the spelling is . i dun care >< )
the sun shone down like fire liddat .
uber hot . grrr .
reached shiwei's house and watched the guys play mahjong with real cash .
pretty exciting to play with real money .
haha .

went home at 5.15pm
confronted by an auntie at the bus stop and questioned abt my school's cut off point .
haha . i nvr thought i will be asked that qn .

tats abt it for taday (:
lookin forward to sea regetta
(time to chiong the mass dance LOL dun wanna lao kui in front of my fren)
jkjk =x

Jiayou for Nats
VJ swim team (:

soon ,
all we have left ,
will just be memories .
RadicalLove

8 Jan

2009-01-08T07:57:00.000-08:00

Pre-blog rant:
finally broke my swimming PB :D
improved to 36sec for 50m freestyle .
woots ! jiayous ~!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY APPLE

haha,
we noe its abit late for the celebration,
but its the thought that counts rights :D
i dun think u noe that we set this outing to celebrate with u rights . lol .

okok , i shall start :3
hm..
woke up early today and mugged for awhile
befr going out . phy ..... argghhhh . hate it =\
then met dan , kenneth and apple at cine,
bought tix for ip man
and went to makan at the 1st floor de fast food place .
the omelette noodle i ordered was nice , to me ~O~
kenneth's reasoning was that cuz my mom's cooking too plain ,
anything else is better LOL .
cannot deny that too . rofl . sorry mum :x
apple ordered similar to mine , except her egg is scrambled
and dan ordered a bowl of rice ?
the color of the rice is weird though . lol .
i dun recommend the place cuz the food is really small in serving
and the items are limited . cine doesnt have much to eat anyways .
unless u like food court style haha .

thn 'rushed' to our seats at the cinema cuz we are a lil late for the time .
but ah , heck .
ip man is a uber nice movie btw .
its the best ive seen in the hols .
its mostly abt the Chinese's pride in martial arts in World War II
and stuff . was really funny and touching at times . haha .
the plot was portrayed really well and wasnt too draggy (like twil .. ER HUM)
yep yep . so a must watch :D

hm aft movie was ard .. 1445h ?
then trained to bedok and went to the bike shop at marina cove .
and cycled 3/4 way to changi village ? i dunno . nvr cycle that far b4
haha and daniel was practising his freezes and stuff on the grass along the way .
of cuz , i gave him a few tips . haha .
and half his face is red cuz he was allergic to grass .
dumb . still do on grass . dunno for wat . lol .
rode back to the shop when time's up .

and of cuz went to subway to get our dinner .
ordered subway meltz .
and dan went to get the slice of cake for apple .
WHOLE CAKE ! WHOLE CAKE !
nt SLICE ! ah dey ._.
oh well .
apple couldnt finish it so we ate bits of it haha .

as usual , the day ended with us training / busing the way home .
sighhhhhhh ,
sch reopening .....
no more meet ups till after A's
wtfknnccbnnbfuckingmofotard
i will miss the peeps ive caught up with during this hols .
=(
oh well .
life has to move on .

sleep time .
nites peepo .

这不叫怕老婆，
而是尊敬。
RadicalLove

31 & 1 Dec

2009-01-02T08:06:00.000-08:00

rawr my body clock is still screwed up .
anywaysssssssss .

hm lets see .
ah . 31st dec 2008 ,
the last day of the year .
gladly spent it with my pri sch frens :D
where to start . ah i noe !

met yuntong at 12.30pm at our block de lift lobby,
and went to the bus stop to meet cheryl tan .
so long nv see her still look the same .
pity , NO ONE from my pri sch recognises me =\
well maybe its for the better hees .

then went to bedok and met up with felix .
got into a (rather ?) squeezy train and went to kallang and met up with the rest .
well there were er ...
yiqian , mike , me , yuntong , cheryl tan , siew ping , meixian , felix and the late (bastard, or so they commented) yenriel and the early bird maehwee . lol .
went for ice skating . pretty excited cuz i dunno hw to blade ._.
felix parted with us for awhile cuz he dun wanna blade and went bowling . SORANG !
moving on,
im like wa lao when i got the skates . uber smelly la !
like rotten banana liddat .
so anyways ,
put on the skates and went into the ring .
like so uber many ppl lo .
me and yiqian were like the few of the noobs around .
mike that asshole was skating like so freely infront of us . zzz
then yiqian and i were like walking -> slow skate . lol .
quite fun i would say , though i got a small blister on my left foot .

aft that was dinner at cafe cartel at P.S.
met up with louisa outside cafe cartel too
had some crispy fish set meal .
celebrated lousia's bdae dere too .
happy belated gal ! :D
its a rather nice cheesecake .
it would be nice if the guys didnt play zong ji mi ma .
cuz i swear , my appetite was ruined by all the disgusting food .
looking is bad enuff . =\
lucky i tio once nia haha . though it was a mistake made by the gals who set the number zzz .
anyways , they planned to sabo the guy that didnt tio so . no diff .
i pity yiqian lol . cuz one round he has to eat pure butter with a (teaspoon?) of tabasco . lol
kept drinking water after that cuz it was uber hot . lol .
he teared lo . nose aso red , can see hw hot it is . lol .

hm then ... trained to tanah merah to meet nicholas ,
felix , mike and yiqian parted with us to meet up with other ppl hm yea .
so left me with the gers training to tanah merah .
i tell you , the only guy in the girl group sucks .
esp when the topic is abt singapore tv shows which i have NO clue on . zzz
so i was dazing around and fang kong - ing . lol
chatted abit when the topic changed to dance :D
lol . i love dance and swim for your info :D keke .

reached tanah merah , met with nic ,
and walked to louisa's house .
cheryl shared with me her dance experience at sch too haha .
esp with sissy guy frens and nerd dancers xP
lucky i aint either of those keke .
dropped by nic chin's house too . aka Sq haha for those at IRC reading this .
played with his huge dog abit .
then continued the way to louisa's house .

put-ted bags at her room .
and i cant believe i did the turtle freeze and the baby freeze on the small space in her room lol .
then went down to the living room and watched xiao niang re .
i swear , its the first ep of my life that i watched it .
fans of it dun come whacking me .
cheryl lim came by abit later at ard 11+ or 10 forgot , in time for the countdown .
thn tuned in to the countdown of mediacorps while we cluedo-ed and uno stacko-ed away .
did a few breakdancing moves and got em the woo ahhs .
cuz their impression of me was still the dumb ben back then haha .
i dun deny im dumb and nerdy in the past . cuz i am lol .
and cheryl went to pick up the baby freeze and im like ........
i cant believe she really wanna learn lol .
then taught em the arm wave too .
and mae hwee was darn weird doing em haha .
cuz she froze too long at the shoulder and looked weird rofl .
(sorry ah , i forgot which came first , the dance show or the games lol .)

thn was the countdown haha .
pretty short for us ,
we were like .
oh the tv show started the count and we went ,
9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, wooooo 2009 ~~~ clap clap clap ,
and went back to stacko LOL .
cuz i was pulling out a darn hard one ( which i lost )
=\

yiqian and mike came along in the cab,
joined us at ard 3 i remember roughly,
while i practised abit of Show Luo's dance .
i cant get rusty now can i ? haha

thn bridged for awhile and went to shower,
catched harry potter on HBO or sth ,
then watched a few movie , before a few of em drifted off into sleep .
some of us, the not so sleepy and feeling bo liao ones ,
yuntong , cheryl tan , maehwee , mike , yiqian and i ,
went to a indian food stall at dunno where LOL
too dark larhs . cannot see road sign . walked for ard 5 min then reach so shld be near...
chit chatted abit .
played tricks on yiqian , cheryl and maehwee haha .
internet power rocks lol .
i learnt almost all my stuff dere .
breakdance , hiphop , pranks . haha .

(sorry readers , 2 days of blog post , of cuz long and tiring , stay with me :D)

then da-paoed back to louisa's house ,
for the sleepy peepo as breakfast .
i was too tired and slept for like 1 hour from 6 to 7 ,
6 - still dark , then 7 - i woke up all bright .
i was actually stunned by hw bright it turned lol .
then watched tom and jerry's , the uber long ago show ,
its still rather funny when watching it nowadays . haha
thn finally walked back home ,
saw 2 squirrels on the way back too ~
and slept till lunch .

the rest of the day was pretty much routine ... nth special ...
so i shall stop blogging here .
oh darn .
its 12.40am
gotta go sleep .
nights peepo .

well, i guess i shld do sth first ...
and i think my pri sch frens will wanna read too haha .
My first impression of .......

yuntong: nth much lol , saw her pretty often cuz she lives 9 storeys away haha .

cheryl tan: looks the same really , still rather loud haha . nice to talk to too :)

cheryl lim: i dunno why but since pri sch i found her facial expressions very cold . even though we are in the same JC and i see her often . i still feel her face is still very ... cold . lol .

mike: as beng as ever . gotten very de bhb aso . The End .

yiqian: nth much has changed from my last impression . only realised his muscles got abit firmer from the chalet last year haha .

felix: one word - fat .

siew ping: ive got to say , its realli still the same . im still nt very close to ya , so ... i dunno u really well , but appearance wise , its somewhat similar :)

meixian: haha looks like sean's the new hot topic for u :x nth much abt u too , got that lil bit closer to you but still unable to comment much . oh . i remember sth . there's till the korean / jap madness right .. haha .

louisa: happy belated ! i always thought u were very quiet haha . mayb cuz i dun talk to u much . many thanks for hosting the countdown at ur house too :)

maehwee: nt much change either . if u really wanna noe , ur voice has gotten deeper from my impression LOL . pls dun read this . =P okok . i shall say a good point ... errr .. okok , u look cuter :D does it make up for the last comment ?

nicholas: still as cheeky as ever . and im amazed hw easily u can interact with girl topics LOL . like tv shows and bitching too lol . tsk . u are undergoing sex change ..... lol ...

me: looking back , i indeed have changed aplenty , dunno if its for better or worse , but i feel that my life is much lively now . its great to have met up with ya all . seriously , esp when i have some issues with some of my social relations .. im glad to have re-met with u all and improved the bonds we had and have :) i have no idea what are your impressions of me but anything goes yea ? so . do tell me if i overdo sth , cuz im rather insensitive to some stuff :S thx yuntong too . for getting this altogether . i wish that our paths will cross again somewhere down the road of life . happy new year's to u all :)

(sorry if i missed anyone out . im really worn out and im trying my best to recall . su-yi-ma-seh and picts will be up later , when our yuntong has finished fixing her comp .)

Tag Replies:
Ralph: haha sure sure but wait till after A's ba lol

Yichen: you are welcomed to tag too :D

Claudia: haha sorry la . . from now on i think i wont be concentrating much on internet stuff liao . muz mug le .. so wont tag as much . i will still be ur zhong shi reader :) work hard for ur O's ah . i cannot help u from now on le . i have exams too :( jiayous !

fun times have to end ,
and life has to move on .
all we have left are fond memories of the time we had .
RadicalLove

31 Dec

2008-12-30T08:51:00.000-08:00

Last day of 2008 . .
gna countdown with frens today .
wat abt u guys ? :3

hmm lets see .
ahh chalet for the past 2 days , 28 & 29 .
to tell the truth .
its the worst chalet i have been to =_=
totally unentertaining (the movie was the only thing nice)
no bbq , and nt much of inter-group interaction :s
cliques suck .
and thx to the chalet aso ,
my sleep cycle is pronounced as screwed up
by Doc Daniel Wong =\
got 2 hours of sleep for chalet . zai right ?
LoL .

okayokay , have to regain my sleep cycle ,
but its bound to be broken again tonight .
haha .

Happy New Year's to all !

Tag Replies:
Claudia:
1) wa lao , say i bo liao tsk . dun spam then u noe , then nth good for ur tag board liao . wahahaha .
2) x'mas went past , HAPPY NEW YEAR ! enjoying wif ur family righttttt :3
3) my comp the best okay , better than ur claudia brain LOL . where got lag . is u lag in posting .
4) o.o u will cry de meh ? i tot ur skin sibei thick one ? x3 jkjk . fine fine . cute claudia . muz adopt u and keep as pet LOL . one of a kind animal x3
5) haha now a new one for you PHILLIPINO . not malay liao . happy right ~ got 2 race .
6) my hols end 10 days later than you , 10 days can do alot of stuff de okay . OPPS . ur sch reopening in 2 days LOL . 31st today woooo
7) APPEAR IN FRONT OF CLAUDIA . i dont see you anywhr . LIAR !
8) claudia brain jiu shi claudia brain . ur blogs got write ur classes de mah . alamak . of cuz i noe
9) glad u noe ur hols ending . DO UR HW .
10) i am tired lo . sleep cycle tio disturb . rawrrrrr .
11) i got update lo . my rate is btr than urs . u spam so many at one go . tiring to read de siol tsk .
12) this called too zai to delete . nt noob .
13) ya la u shit shit . always no time no time =( now really no time to meet liao . SHITSHIT !
14) ya ~ xx Aussies and Americans use it in IRC chats haha . they are nice peepo :3
15) haha . if u noe lo . nice gers :3

Agnes:
1) lol . pro meh ? more like siao gina de reasoning LOL . i bet u dun even noe the meaning of that cheng yu.
2) tsk . still haven try out hotel626 ah you . go try la . dun trickster all day :3
3) ya lo ! stone mah . waiting for ppl to polish into diamond ... so ? wanna polish me ? =D
4) MeOw :3
5) LoL back x2
6) hols ending liao la . sian u . break promise to help me . <\3
7) angel bully ppl ? angel very wei da de okay . where got bully . see my wei so da . of cuz i angel . ;P
8) ya lo ! so agitated ! come , let this angel purify ur angered soul . :3
9) Lol five ;p
10) answer all the same means u nv think = brain dead . oh , u brain dead liao . how to read this . hm .
11) Welcome ~! see i so li mao , say thank you i reply u . tsk . im an angel . ;p
12) =\ its the sameeeeeeee copycat ! dun deny ! BLEH
13) han nah . u sooooo zai . so trust me :3 muz give u a kiss for that . x
14) btw x = kiss . LOL .

the time between birth and death,
is called life .
(a funny quote from a vasamtham show)
RadicalLove

23 Dec

2008-12-23T06:27:00.000-08:00

An early christmas peepo :D
cuz i wont be blogging on the 25th rofl .

hm ok whr to start .
ah yes .
met daniel at TPY inter for swim ,
and kenneth overslept so he didnt come .
taught daniel a lil about swimming haha .
he's juz too panicky abt swimming luh lol .
and he helped me timed my 200 I.M.
so heres a new timing added :

200m I.M. - 03:53:70 min

its a very big pity ,
cuz i have to drop this event too .
the timing for finals was 2:40:00 min thereabout
which is impossible for me .
cuz 1 min improvement in 4 mths time is imba .
and i aint imba .
sigh , so now i have to pick another event .
uber sad de can . i was hoping i can bring it ard 3 min
thn so kns , wasted so much energy in the butterfly and back ,
until the end the breast and free i cant even do properly .
god damnit .
really God Damnit .

worse is training alrdy ended .
so there aint much time left for me to train either .
sighhhhhh .
im hating this :S

okok for the fun stuff .
went bugis after swim to meet quanxiang .
then bought my long awaited vest too :D
now i have a vest for my tee woo !
hmm went to eat at the food court at bugis .
kinda suck . had hokkien mee . nt that nice ,
compared to the one near my house :D

then travelled all the way back to the east side ECP .
and yes , i picked up cycling . :D
uber fun de can . i esp like the feeling when u pedal so fast ,
then glide and the wind juz sweep to ur face so nicely ,
so much like gliding in the water when swimming .
loved it woo !
but darn stupid kenneth's bike got probs so had to exchange TWICE
zzz wasted 1 hour in total like wtf -.-
its quite cheap though . 6 bucks for 3 hours (uncle said he in good mood)
normally its 2 lol . and deres a bottle of water to go with it :D
so cycled somewhere in between changi and ecp ,
i have no idea where we stopped .
then cycled back and rested awhile at the shop
cuz still got 1 more hour .
so we went in the other direction and stopped where the ecp ended .

Totally enjoyed today la .
(except the thing about my lap timing like omgwtfpwnbbq,
screw up my mood that lil bit)
but i still look forward to the next cycling session woo !

i really hope ,
everything pays off .
Finals , am i reaching there ?
RadicalLove

20 Dec

2008-12-20T05:30:00.000-08:00

IRC outing taday ~
Daniel , Khairul , Kenneth , Ben (not me)
called nick but he say he cnt make it .
went to catch twilight after having lunch at Ramen10 (??)

the movie was nice .
i din noe why dan said it was a sucky one .
but i agree that the girls giggling away,
was more entertaining than the movie . LOL .
they were laughing at un-needed moments .
its lame at times . like laughing at mini facial expressions .
well , girls . what to say ? LoL .
its a rather nice movie if anyone wanna watch it .

went to meet shaozhe
and went to play pool at some plaza cum hotel . ard istana dere .
saw david from VJ with some girl . tsk . even he aso can have gf D=
then went for dinner at Long John,
had the norm ,
and Khairul and Dan were sharing NS moments
on how ppl use excuses and such . LOL .
after dinner was arcading at Doby Ghaut MRT area .
watched some of em play a few games .

tats abt it for today i guess .
shall get to bed after a few rounds of CS .
nights ~
lookin forward to class chalet and P.sch countdown at fren's hse :D

Tag Replies :
Claudia:
1) wait long long lo . then jiu will see her . lol . very long =\ nv intro a few gals . LOL .
2) heh . international chat language la . stupid ochibi . xx LOL
3) sigh . go out sometime . hols ending le D= i still haven meet up wif u =(
4) Lol . fine fine finger dead . now ur finger can revive riaoz muah ? blog more eh .
5) yawns .
6) hols was so-so more entertaining than previous years . met up wif alot of new ppl . young and old . fun xD
7) tsk . u be middle girl then good ma . i dun noe her very well aso . then she aso like dun wan meet up lol . u and her were classmates .. easier for u lolx .
8) u think i david copperfield ? u wan me appear then i appear ? lol . in ur dreams lo . then i can appear LOL .
9) 12 Jan . woo ! longer than u . WAHAAH . u start sch i still in hol mode LOL .
10) heh . see . not only i say u look like malay . ppl even ask u fr number sia la . eyeliner too thick la LOL . ochibi
11) cute = ugly but adorable . but we ignore the adorable part . u are juz ugly LOL .
12) always update ? ya right . dun fake . lol . more like one week once . so lag . NOOB ochibi .
13) O - K - A - Y :D
14) see im the ONLY one . so pro . LOL .

the race has begun .
RadicalLove

16 Dec

2008-12-15T08:30:00.001-08:00

1week after my bdae and im sick ~
darn ! zzz
stupid flu ._. sigh
make me miss my last 2 (?) training .

its a viral strain according to Daniel,
which is less severe than bacterial ones .
so hopefully i can recover in time for the last training T_T

so for now , im stuck at home .
and and and ,
im almost done learning a few of the solo sections of dance,
in Show's songs . whee ~ =D

hols coming to an end. . .
work nt yet revised complete. . .
nOoOooOoooooo :(

Tag Replies:
Agnes:
1) LoL- u noob la where got 班斧弄门 one ! omg ~ anyhow use . tsk .
2) cannot be ! 3D games are more . . . visually interesting . better than 2D de . dun argue with me . i have tonnes of 3D games and i love em woo !
3) of cuz i got vocal talent ~ is u nv notice nia . u noe , unpolished stone is a diamond ? im the stone ! mwahahah
4) ya lo ! u cannot see my halo mah , of cuz u blind ~ LoL - HALO ! =P
5) LoL -
6) im waiting ~
7) i noe i very big , but i whr got bully, im an angel leh . . how can bully ppl ? =P
8) its angel angel angel , not a devil ! ;x
9) IT IT IT IT IT , got power liao hor ? agitated ma ? ;x
10) LoL three ;P
11) stiff answers whr got style ? all the pattern all the same , my answers then zai . u noob =P
12) lol okay lo ~ short cutie ~ muz say thank you for praising you ;P
13) eeee copy my reply >.<
14) haha thx for the wish ;)

Ralph:
hell no . im nt owned by anyone lol

Claudia:
1) LoL- your grand entrance of spams rofl .
2) lol i tell u so many many many times liao . i dun need act pro de . . i AM pro . and of cuz ~ I OK ma . . then everybody ok . . is see me OK then everyone OK . see ? i so big LOL
3) u always so lagging de lehs . update faster la !
4) LoL- ya la ~ u stupid fish ~ say wan meet aso nv meet . thn nvr include me in the list aso D= dun fren u laaaaa
5) lol pui ah . u so troublesome whr got cute ;P
6) ya la , u wink , smile like *chicken* liddat . lol jkjk ;P dun attract meeeeee noooooo
7) last few trainings liao . . then i sick cannot go . wat the #$!%
8) see you now ? i have never seen u befr LoL since dunno when
9) me and agnes nvr meet b4 . wanted to but our schedules always clash . lol u be medium again lo ask her out tgt LOL
10) ya lo . we both angels and agnes say i devil D= waaaa
11) dun tell you lehhhhh . OCHIBI ;P
12) who else brain is dead ? yours la ! still ask . so long nvr blog tsk .
13) ya la ya la . miss you . happy ? xx
14) btw x=kisses in internet chat lol .

hmm claudia=agnes? math :
har ? claudia =/= agnes . 2 diff ppl lol . im guessing u are ralph =\

the end is approaching . .
and so is the start . .
RadicalLove

11 Dec

2008-12-11T07:54:00.000-08:00

it's my bdae today ~ woo !
haha .
thx y'all for the bdae wishes .
thx VJ swim team for accompanying me :3
and thx to Andy, Irving and Nicole,
for the bdae greeting :3
still have to say thanks even if u guys arent reading this :3

went for training early in the morning ~
1000m warm up was killer rofl .
and the rest was kinda fine ~
after training was intense playing at the playground
pictures will be uploaded laters ~

then went for lunch at suntec pizza hut
oh and we went to the fountain of wealth too haha
juz for fun rofl
its kinda dumb but well , they wanted to go so :3

went home after that ,
was uber shag for the whole day ,
had much fun too :3
thx y'all again

hm
3 wishes for bdae :
1) A's for 'A' levels
2) For me to qualify for swim national finals nxt yr :D
3) -Secret- :3

As promised , the picts :3

the balls written at suntec for the New Year thingy at marina bay :3

Tag Replies: Done at tagboard due to lil taggies :3

就算你不记得，
这首歌唱完的是我。。。
RadicalLove

6 , 8 , 9 Dec

2008-12-09T06:54:00.000-08:00

23Busy weekends ~
uber shag ~ juz came home .
shall try my best to recall and blog :3

Saturday
went out to meet IRC fwens .
hmm ,
deres Daniel , Xinhao , Kenneth and Nicholas .
thn met up with Apple after we had our lunch at forum shopping mall .
nth much of the exhilarating feeling of meeting up with online strangers .
esp when all we do is game rofl .
and daniel was the only one that recognised me cuz he saw my pic
thn kenneth was leaning against the wall and reading a book . lol .
thn we 4 went to mac's and had lunch .
daniel had the mega mcspicy which made his tummy turn inside out
and had to run to the toilet alot of times at home lol .
noobshat ! cannot take spice then still eat . zzz
thn we tricked nicholas lol .
cuz he dunno faces mah then he went one round ard mac's finding us
LOL . saded .
and said xinhao was the gay LOL .
for those blur readers ,
daniel's the fake gay that licks everyone that signs in to IRC rofl
thn we went forum to meet apple after xinhao left to meet his frens for chalet .
thn sat down at coffee bean and chatted . games , study , social life etc etc .
then i realised that nicholas was the nicholas chin in my pri sch lol .
for those of you in my pri sch may noe him haha .
met up wif apple ~
thn we went to forum de secret recipe and had a tea break .
then apple shared her work experience as waitress in a nearby hotel .
sigh . so far i havent got a chance to work ._.
really wanna try out being an economist of some sort some day . rofl .
thn sian sian . walk to taka and walked back to MRT rofl .
and took the same train wif nick and chatted abt our differing lifestyles haha .
it was nice meeting online ppl at times and see hw their faces look like ,
behind the facade they use in the cyber world . haha
and daniel , u do NOT look like a doctor (though u are) nor a gay
nor someone that licks . rofl . u juz look too honest . haha .

missed the class outing for cycling on sunday . . sorry T.T

Monday
early in the morning had a swimming team outing .
which i was late .
cuz that morning was raining and my mum thought its cancelled .
lol so i woke up at 11 and meeting time is 11 .
zai right LOL .
so paiseh leh have to make em wait lol .
dad fetched me to ECP area . thn walked to mac's
th team was alrdy seated and playing cards and having outside food .
then tio the cleaner and got chased out . rofl .
and cuz of the stupid rain , went to the amphi-theatre and sat down for 'picnic'
whn we are supposed to be at the beach ROAR !
played cards and the music at the place was like blasting all over . wth lo ~ zzz
and ryan was almost sleeping thru the whole thing cuz some of em went overnight cycling
haha ~ too bad i dunno hw to cycle :P
cuz of the stupid rain . our plan till 5pm was cut short till ard 2 ? 3 ?
sian lo . >_>
no picts again ~ so sorry ~ lol
i have a sucky phone and sucky cam . so . gg . lol

Tuesday
went for pri sch de gathering ~ met up with our teacher miss yeow
shes retiring this year according to our organiser *ahems*
so yea . met up for lunch at hong kong street along bedok road .
and we er hum . abit de . yi si yi si and got her a box of chocs at cold storage lol
its okay . its the heart that counts =x
hm now who was dere ?
ah yes ,
nicholas (late) , yiqian (late) , felix (left after 1 hr, forced to makan wif us LOL)
and ...
michael , me , yuntong , zhimin , louisa , meixian .
had a good time chatting haha .
some had to leave after lunch , erm , who .... ah , zhimin and felix .
then the few of us went to cathay to watch bolt ~
a typical animation movie i guess . nt much mystery .
the dog and hamster was cute haha .
thn dilly dallyed to wisma and ate at the food republic .
the guys all ordered from the same foodstall
and the girls shared a mini steamboat .
i have no idea why girls eat so lil lol .
stomach so big ~ the food can squeeze where ? lol
poor organiser had to think of almost everything to do for the day.
hehe . sad to be u xP
post lunch , post dinner , all she arrange LOL
thn cam whored from ard 8+ ? to ard 9 lol
we went around taking picts with things that matches the color of our outfit .
dumb~ >_>
will upload the picts later haha
slacked at far east for quite some time .
the stage dere was perfect la ~
i wish i can play some loud music can do some breaking .
too bad i duno hw to break properly and i no music . sadded .
and its farnie de lo .
even go home aso walk tgt .
cuz all live at the same area at bedok lol .
take MRT aso take to same stop haha
walked home wif yuntong
and yiqian and michael as our escorts LOL
thanks yea brothers ? lol
had a good time today ~ haha
wish we can meet up more often x)

time for picts ~

Tag Replies:
Agnes:
1) lol . pri sch textbook alrdy noe liao ah o.o i bet thats the only cheng yu u noe LOL
2) trickster de graphics nt good one leh . . duno if fun anot lol =\
3) i insisted the hug one meh ?? no lo ~ i bet u aso very willing to let me hug LOL
4) horns ? no la ~ go get a new pair of glasses or contacts . cfm is halo . lol seesee ?
got wings aso . i can fly ~~~
5) joking that means can la ? YAY! lol
6) hah i dun mind if ya all swim with me . juz dont forget to record timing can liao xD
7) i bet if u swim with me cannot catch up one mwahahahaha
8) ya la ~ of cuz . im an angel ~ of cuz muz help an angel in distress xD
9) over liao ma ~ chill x)
10) lol <---- **learn from u . use one word as a tag **
11) sian . so many things to blog still do survey ROAR ! fine fine . i will do ~ happy ? x)

Ralph: 1) lol u aso nv break , she stopped tagging a long time ago LOL . lagger ~

1. The person who tagged you is? Agnes

2. Your relationship with him/her? Online buddies

3. Your 5 impressions of her. Girl , cute , short ? , gamer , cam whorer LOL

4. The most memorable thing he/she has done for you. MAKE ME DO THIS SURVEY . rofl

5. The most memorable thing he/she has said to you. you are tagged to do the quiz on my blog.

6. If she/he become your lover, thing he/she has to improve will be? to be cuter LOL .

7. If she/he become your enermy, you will? THIS MEANS WAR !!!!!!!!!

8. What is it you want to tell her now? help me time my laps ~ LOL

9. Your overall impression of her is? a possible friend worth knowing x)

10. How do you think the person around you will feel you? hm . very . . . open ?

11. The characters you love of yourself are? im too perfect . wahahahaha

12. On the contrary, the characters of you hate yourself are? im too perfect . sobs .

13. The most ideal person you want to be is? someone that can love another :)

14. For ppl that care and like you, say something to them. Thank y'all ~ arigato ~ i noe im the special one LOL .

15. Pass this quiz to 10 person that you wish to know about their feel about you. -not doing ~ very tired liao LOL . still got photos to upload . roar !

16. Who is no.6 having relationship with?

17. Is no.9 a female or male?

18. If no.7 & no.10 get together, will it be a good thing?

19. What is no.2 studying about?

20. When was the last time you had a chat with no.3?

21. What kind of music band does no.8 like?

22. Does no.1 has siblings?

23. Will you woo no.3?

24. How bout no.7?

25. Is no.4 single?

26. What is the surname of no.5?

27. What is a hobby of no.10?

28. Does no.5 & no.9 get along well?

29. Where is no.2 studying at?

30. Talk bout something for no.1.

31. Have you tried delevoping feelings for no.8?

32. Where does no.9 live?

33. What colour does no.4 like?

34. Are no.1 & no.5 best friends?

35. Does no.1 have any pets?

36. Is no.7 the sexiest person in the world?

37. What is no.10 doing now?
~end of survey~

time . .
i need time . .
RadicalLove

4 Dec

2008-12-04T07:44:00.000-08:00

Weekends are coming ! woohoo !
im gonna make some adjustments to my swimming events again soon .
i think ._.

today's the last day of club training anyways,
oh well ,

Tag Replies:
R: im nt solo . dun say sth tat u dunno abt . or else i will realli be angry .

Agnes:
1) hehe . sense of achievement of cuz have ! like d-u-h ~ x) [what are we talking about ? =x]
2) tsk you ah . very de stubborn . i win liao still dun admit . *sigh* nvr mind , i 孔融让梨 xD dunno what it means right wahahahahahahaahaahahaha
3) busy gaming o.O wat games u play . other than audi rofl .
4) lol of cuz hug la then what ? u ask de mah haha =x
5) WALAO I NOT PERV LA PLEASE . i uber pure de can . see the halo on my head ? im an angel . hehe .
6) aiseh liddat aso wanna jitiao me . zzz . rofl . kns =S
7) hmm . . i was thinking if u could helppa me abitz . heh . can meetup aso for lunch too ~
8) the favor is hor..can like help me once a week at some swimming complex to time my events anot . cuz now training stop liao..thn i scared i slack off. and my frens all went hols T^T
9) can can ? can help me right ~ of cuz can xD
10) lol i tell u lo . guys ah , all liddat one . talk too much . that time i call u act cute nia u volcano eruption liao >_> sometimes its just a joke ~
11) but lol , yea , shld tell the person that its a joke and nt flare for no reason . anyways . over liaoz ~ 友谊万岁 ~ x)
12) WAHAHAHAAH sadist is here to cut off the thumb u put up ! keke .

Claudia :
1) ya right . busy updating . my foot xP . better find time meetup ah . u kns . xP
2) miss u ? of cuz , i miss deesiao-ing you this ochibi . :3
3) cheh . nv work hard , later brain DEAD .
4) heh i dun wanna tell u xP
5) lol . so rude . my voice is so nice . like that of an angel . x3
6) i am lo ! see the space i took up in ur tagboard ~ im the tag KING keke
7) rawr . you quitter ! bad ochibi ! i bet is u tio fire , nt u quit xD
8) hols . nth much luh . sian 1/2 . i miss swimming ~~~~~
9) lol u attractive . . >_> who lie to you ? xD
10) girls nt trouble . . they are disasters x) tats why the boss fire you ROFL
11) jj thing , nvr go la . no one pei me , i go alone so weird . all ur fault ! waste a tix BLEH
12) i also forget wat we talking abt LOL . sardines . . tasty xD
13) lol i told u so many times liao . tsk . i dun act pro , i AM pro wakakaka . and dun kick me . kick me ur leg pain nia . roflmao
14) hehe , i dun need to impress you . cuz u alrdy are impressed the moment u saw me hehe !

假期的时候要吃，就要挑好料来吃，
不然，训练的时间都浪费了~
-教练
RadicalLove

1 Dec

2008-12-01T07:38:00.000-08:00

time really flies .
im getting emo dese few days

been doing nth much these holidays
loneliness , boredom and wavering determination
accompanied me through the last one month .
friends are all busy ,
travelling overseas .

~Swim matters~
im getting the thought that no one in the team
gives a damn about swim finals anymore .
cant blame em . but seriously ,
at our standard , do they seriously think we can make the mark ?
broken promises , i hate that .
where's all the "everyday training" ?
where's all the "scouting for our J1 batch" ?
i cant complain too much either . im nt going to that extent too .
but im gonna change myself soon . i hope .
the joy that i feel during training ,
i dun think anyone has it .
sure i do complain abt me being tired ,
but i do love swimming , more than anything .
"The water is my sky" - a quote from somewhere i heard ,
is what i feel when i do my swims .
training is gonna stop in 1 week's time .
im darn sure , i can cancel that swim finals goal in my wishlist now
its not gonna come true anymore .

Dec
1mth left to sch reopening ,
gotta catch up on my work .
S for econs definitely wont do .
everything i had loved , is breaking apart once again .
but i will fix it . i swear i will do my best .
bdae's coming but i guess i will spend it alone again .
bah , who cares . its been that way the past few years ,
im numb alrdy . but im still lookin forward to that day ,
cuz perhaps, i could ask a few meetups with online frens .
i dunno . i realli dislike the group of friends i have since i entered college .
class ? humph , i and them are completely of different worlds i feel ,
to them , im juz weird and unsociable .

well its back to the same thing as always -
study and swim ,
its all my life needs right now .
though im still waiting for tat "her" to appear .
waiting . . .

"One day, a boy saw a dream,
twirling , twirling , flying , flying ,
so happy in its freedom ,
he thought he was a butterfly.
But when he opened his eyes ,
the boy was no butterfly ,
but only a mere human .
then he thought,
'did i just see a dream where i was a butterfly,
or is this a dream as well?
maybe i'm but a dream ,
seen by the butterfly .
Even if it is a dream,
if you have beliefs,
wishes, things you love,
those will become reality."
how true IS this ?

Tag Replies:

Agnes:
1)heh then i should post more more more then we can spam each other's tag HAHA xD

2) no lo ~ olympic sports also count by points de ma , the bigger the number the more points then decide who is first . so , i win xD

3) time need to find one meh ? o.o

4) ok lo , dun mind hehe =D *hugggggggggles* xD

5) eeeeeee dun 叔叔 leh , like some perv eh lol

6) sadist ? o.o why ?

where?
where is she ?
RadicalLove

26 Nov

2008-11-26T06:51:00.000-08:00

today is a uber shag day .

before i post, check out dese few stuffs i found on the net,
THEY ARE GOOD :D TRUST ME , MUST SEE

Optical Illusions
The best optical illusion pictures.

www.winterrowd.com

woke up at 7am in the morning to meet swim ppl in sch
go henderson road de arena warehouse sale .
so freaking early la , and i was like half awake on the bus .

thn on the way saw this freaking big house ,
with 3big cars and the size was like what ? 2 plots of land ?
you ppl curious can go see, its around mountbatten road de junction .
hope nxt time i can buy that kind of house and let my family live x)

ah well, the shit part comes .
realli shit .
walk from bus stop happily meet lucas at the interchg,
then walking to the warehouse under a tree and
a fucking mothercb fucktard asshole shitface knn ccb bird
go fucking land a atomic bomb on my shirt .
like wtf man . SUAY la _l_
i catch that bird i gna skin it and roast it and let it burn in hell .
ROAR.

thn went to nearby de toilet go wash . lucky can wash off .
uber suay . zzzz
and uber stupid lo , the warehouse sale only sells swim suits etc ,
no gears at all . GEARS ! we no need those cheapskate goggles and trunks .
we have better quality ones xP

thn bo ban huat go raffles place and still dun have .
so i spent like a whole morning walking and my legs are like gna break zzz
waste my beauty sleep . sianzor .
thn last resort went to taka to buy our paddles . ~O~
*and ps oh ochibi , forgot whr u working cannot go visit u rofl*

and so , im sitting here now super tired and pissed at my luck today .
well nt exactly pissed . >_>

anyways , looking forward to meeting up with mi online buds nxt week
and ochibi , meet up sometime lei ,
i still owe u tat bet and u still haven teach me biking <_<
dun wuss out ehx ._.

ohoh, a few vids to share :)

Awareness Test 1
Awareness Test 2
Awareness Test 3
Awareness Test 4

okay la ~
tmr still got training,
go koon liao .
buai buai .

Tag Replies:
Jem : rofl , i dun scared u ppl come spam de lo . wan spam aso spam meaningful stuffs . dun deesiao jiu okay .

Agnes :
1) hehe , u becoming my 2nd 忠实 reader liao heh . come my taggie tag so many times . come more <3

2) no larhs . the rule is always bigger the better =x so i cfm win one . 1st 2nd 3rd may not be the best , who noe the ppl bribe the judge . ROFL random =x . so yea , anyways i win xD

3) nice of cuz nice :D muz go play okay :D

4) hehe ya lo u 乖（怪） gerger, nv spam my phone xD wanna give u a hug ? rofl .

5) lol i nt uncle de ok , i so youthful ~ heehees . and 乖 korkor aso sound okay mah ~ c'mon let me hear it , say "乖 korkor" ~ xD

"time stops for no man",
i wish i wasn't a man,
but a being that can control time,
so that i can revert the time
to where my memories were fond...
RadicalLove

23 Nov

2008-11-22T08:42:00.001-08:00

Minor Update:

1) freestyle 50m : 00:38.0 min (unchanged)
2) freestyle 100m : 00:01:33 min (improved)
3) breaststroke 100m : 00:01:51 min (improved)

Jiayou ~!
RadicalLove

17 Nov

2008-11-17T05:34:00.001-08:00

aw damn it .
having a freakish headache now .
shall post and go to sleep asap .

went for training today as usual .
and i made suggestions for time trials
plus a new management team ~
hope it can help our team well :)

oh and here's a minor update for my timings:

1) freestyle 50m : 00:38.0 min (unchanged)
2) freestyle 100m : 00:01:39 min (did not do this event today)
3) breaststroke 100m : 00:01:52 min (improved)

well i guess thats abt it ~
sat deres the JJ Lin phototaking at suntec ~
and i havent got the camera ~ oh gosh !
dunno if anyone is going with me . all seems busy =\
ah well ~

Day by day,
my confidence level is shaking.
Can i make it ?
RadicalLove

13 Nov

2008-11-12T21:51:00.000-08:00

SIAN
juz came back from training . .
feel so uber tired . . zzz >_>

ok time to keep track of my record in mi blog :D

1) freestyle 50m : 00:38.0 min
2) freestyle 100m : 00:01:39 min
3) breaststroke 100m : 00:02:09 min

hope i can improve till the finals nxt yr lo xD

and stupid gamesurge .
ban me from its server .
stupid shit . now cannot play notd:am zzz
those who have warcraft can go try the map heehee .
fun de ok :D

Games on the playing list :
Command and Conquer 3 : Kane's Wrath
Notd:AM (Warcraft 3)
Mousehunt (Facebook)
Counterstrike

Drama to be watched :
不良笑花
斗鱼 1 & 2

Site recommendation for manga :
http://www.onemanga.com

hope to meet up with my frens soon :D

Tag Replies:
Agnes :
1) 无价之宝 = no price on it mah =P thn i 顺手牵羊 lo . come come . wanna 比成语 cfm lose me wakakaka ;x
2) the hotel is open from 6pm to 6am haha . so what kind of game you think it is ? ;x

Claudia :
1) hehe . its my 招牌 ok . i very special one u dunno meh . of cuz mus write replied =x
2) so 巧 my blog is titled rubbish and bugs LOVE rubbish . so u love my blog = u love me right ;D thnk euu thnk euu ;D
3) packed ? like sardine ah can eat some thn wont be so packed le mah ;x ok im talking crap hees.
4) dese few days wna meet out mai ? i tio ban frm my game by game server de admin zzz cannot play ROAR . uber bored . zzz
5) hire you be my biking instructor lo ! hehe . so i hire u liao , thn i pay back the debt i owe you frm the bet the other time ok ? okok set =x keke . ownself say . =x
6) o.O nemo ur bf siol . can i eat him ? i love fish xD
7) imba = pro = invincible = zai . see , every word is describing me wakakakakaka .
8) yea . i dunno the 恩怨 between girls . girls are trouble LOL .
9) lazy meh . . . i still got reply ur tags de okay ~
10) you attractive ? attract what ? flies ? =x
11) sheep jump over the fence la LOL . still ask me what's over . short term memory ochibi . go refer to the old tags . lazy ochibi =x
12) lol if i work , the shop dun need other workers liao . me = 1000000000000000 workers . you = 0.0000000001 worker . waste money hiring you =x
13) ): dunno if can reach uni anot . very stress hurhur . but army ._. ok lo . . lol . . not expecting anything . i was botak last time aso . nth new . hehe.
14) hehe tats why im the TAG KING wakakaka .
15) ya la ya la exuberant ochibi . wahaha use big word . dunno right . tsk . noob =x
16) dunno eh . i haven ask him . u be our middleman la . eh no middlewoman . nono ! middlekid ;D ask him whether he wan come along ;D
17) heh dun tell you what's ochibi leeeehhhhhhhh what can you do ? OCHIBI xD
18) eeyer . flunk maths still dun wan study . gogo ! go mug . xD

快乐？
我不知道它是什么。。
RadicalLove

7 Nov

2008-11-07T07:06:00.000-08:00

woooooo hoooooooo

PW's overrrrr ~~ rarrrrrr :D
and mayb wateva tats left of my ties as well . .
oh well .

hols are coming .
and so is training .
yawnz . hate training .
but for the nats nxt yr ,
im willing to give it my all :D

my comp almost crashed btw .
the boot.ini file shit got screwd up .
spent one night fixing . haha .
and my dad REFUSES to buy me an external hard disk
kaoz .
zzz .
oh well .

back to my mangas .
hols = manga + study + training + comp games + meet ups + outings
lookin forward to meeting up wif a few of my frens :D

Tag Replies:
Claudia:
1) walao eh . u noe everything de siol . nt fun de =\ cnt trick you , cnt play wif u . rawrz . muz find more stuff lol .
2) hehe . dun tell u wats tat . only i call u tat hehe . wakakakaka . ochibi ~
3) lol fill ur chatbox btr ma . thn whole list all my name . dominated ! wahahahaha i rox :D u noe i do (:
4) 22 nov ~~ muz make it free ho . . and and you have cam anot ha ? my dad de cam he use for work . . cannot use rawrz .
5) dun deny it la . i noe deep down u feel that i very zai one . careful yo , dun keep it a secret too long will get stressed de . hehe .
6) hehe i overthrow eddy le muh mwahahahahahah . so im the tag KING hehe .
7) ya la 1.5 more yrs gtg army liao . sad right . u noe u are . dun miss me when the time comes . i will miss u though LOL . wont frget u de la (:
8) haha thn believe it hehe . in a few more yrs i will be earning my pay which is mre mre mre than urs keke .
9) too bad its over xD
10) of cuz can ask me a qn . im the zai teacher (: and i noe why u guailan me cuz i too attractive liao . cannot resist talking to me xD
11) lol i understand . tats why i so long nv blog liao mah LOL . if nt for ur tags i will still drag LOL
12) got wat . u and jae lo . dno why u dun like her . thn she aso complain she dun like another ger . all 3 gers all okay wat . -.- i noe all of u . tsk . gers . . .
13) hehe . lack on vids . wanna me give u sometime to collect anot haha . my collection too imba liao . cannot beat one . take ur time take ur time xD
14) O.O happy jiu hao lo xD nemo no longer emo become happy zappy xD
15) i scared of u ? never man ! i scared of . . . BUGS . are u a bug ? LOL
16) nvr work le wo ? lol nvm la ~ no $ nvm d ~ if u need anything ask me i try get it fer u (:
17) meet up ASAP . u everyday so busy derz . rawrz .

别告诉她，我还想她，
恨总比爱容易放下。
当泪水堵住了胸口，
就让沉默代替所有回答。。。
RadicalLove

31 Oct

2008-10-31T08:36:00.000-07:00

Disappointment .
Regret .
New Aims .

Near zero attendance at gym training today as usual .
nowadays its getting boring till it sux .
darn it .

re-started a new game recently .
notdam .
missed the old guys .
if u are ever reading this , do go back to the channel and chat :D
Guinsoo, Crimson , allanoon , no.85, spacepork , yyh , seth , yue .
and all the old dudes :D
i missed all the grown up talks ,
those fun games .
firing at zombies , getting owned by fluffy ...
i realli missed you peeps :)

Tag Replies:
Claudia:
1) not rich ?! ya right . work liao of cuz got money . buying LV summore wa lao .

2) if u cnt remember thn nvm ba (:

3) come la who scared who xD

4) of cuz ! u emo i will emo ! so dun emo ! rhymes xD

5) lol . gers ah . juz keep scoldin each other . got so bad meh ?

6) quote sounds right . then of cuz the blogger is zai for quoting it xD

7) i will never cry ! i will gym till im hunkier than you waakaka

8) dun lazy la ! noob blogger ! BLEH

9) aiya u teach, easy de la LOL

10) nopz 6 nov then finish . sad right sobsob

11) no lo u no make up aso pretty de

12) sometimes ? all the time lo !

13) fine girls have advantage ~ thn bully boy make decision right . poor boys .

14) hehe . im the tag king wahhaha i dun wanna shut up lei . if nt i nt tag king liao HAHA

15) i noe i nt zai . i VERY ZAI . xD

16) 2 weeks time hols le . . 22 nov make sure keep free for the photo taking thing wif JJ hor !

Agnes: lol priceless ? that means cheap ? cuz no price wat LOL . and and and . sry tat time call u act cute . u realli cute in ur picts haha . shall call u cutie (: i mean it (:

training sessions are nt for ponning .
fucking slackers . im pissed .
RadicalLove

27 Oct

2008-10-27T01:17:00.000-07:00

i just realised,

OP is just like . . .
a teacher holding a concert .

hope i accomplish wat i wanted to do .
hees .

Tag Replies:
Claudia:
1) fine la hols start liao lo ~ u still have to work i dun need ~ na na nee poo poo LOL

2) tsk today i free thn u aso no time pei . sob sob .

3) lol random lo . . . i tot it would be weirder and btr than calling me VJC ._.

4) zai . . . study harder la ! aiyozzzzz . still play . tsk . nxt time go mug at library again lol .

5) survivor nt the TV show la dey . is the survivors that survive reading ur blog . haha .

6) wahahahaha . see im the taggy KING . wakakakaka . call me KING hehe .

7) fickle minded lol . more like bo xim . tsk . disappointed in you lol .

8) lol you genius im super genius hehe .

9) o.O your makeup nt thick mehhhh . i tot it was ;x

10) fine fine . nxt time we meet up we discuss wat u wan okay ~ torturer . ):

11) LOL you nv see his msn pm de wo . 2 weeks ago i think . or 1 . duno ah . i got PW nv go . you ah . bo xim la !

12) wa lao . i wanna learn biking la ~~~ don liddat ehhhhh .

13) hehe . wat u talking about ? my posts all very gandong de ;x

14) you ? handsomer than me ? omg . you are living in a world of delusions and lies . hehe . big word understand anot genius ? xD

15) my quotes are nice de la ~ naturally . hehe . im good ;x

16) thru frenster lo ~ lol why lehh o.O i tot u asked that b4 lol .

17) and and dun emo nemo so many times lei . . u emo i emo aso lei . ):

18) nxt time we compete our videos la ! set a date . we each post a video on our blogs and see which one is more gross hehe . i scared u lose to me lei hehe .

19) 11th dec must must must keep free hor ! if i very de sadd de ):

Ryan:
1) shut it ! asshole . paiseh enuff liao . zzz

knowing when to give up,
is a form of success .
RadicalLove

22 Oct

2008-10-22T07:30:00.000-07:00

FINALLY .
some free time .
god dammit .
my mind's all PW stuff .
blardy OP .
shit you .
rawr .

after exams liao still have to MUG !
mug WR , mug script arghhhhhhh @#%^%^&
so busy can ? zzz

and the swim training at CSC today
DID not help relieve stress at all
darn it . tsk .
so tiring lo !
all long D drills .
wat . 4 x 50 , 14 x 50 kicking drills
so long !!!! o my tian . z
can die i tell you .

thn thn a most malu and farnie thing happen today .
dont laugh you assholes reading this cuz i noe you are .
dunno issit becuz of static or some shit .
th bus seat got stuck to my ass and fell when i got up from the seat .
SO MALU CAN
@%&@$^
thn chionged dwn the bus .
leaving my team looking at th fallen seat dazed ._.
omg mannnnnnnnnnn zzzzzzzzzz .

i came on juz to post for u readers okay .
so tired can .
btr appreciate it . laughing assholes .
BLEH .

Tag Replies: (okay. im so freaking lazy now . bare wif it ochibi ;p)
Claudia:
1) lol always pretty ? more like pretty for tt foto nia LOL

2) dun thank me laaaa . th no. of thanks you owe me too much liao LOL

3)tsk . i dun need to act important . i AM important mwhahahah .

4) lol i no time go his judo lehhhh sian . stupid PW zzz . you leh ? got go ?

5) lol so chicken nt call a level liao la o level ochibi LOL . its gng great ! (sarcastic)

6) you dun look like malay in rl la . but the pict . so dark . too dark become indian LOL

7) face it man . the whole world is filled wif claudias and her brain . of cuz im the genius LOL

8) got time to go AND you dere that time i go find you lol . dun play hide and seek ah . though i noe that is ur old blog song LOL

9) LOL . no link wif durians wat . if nt call spam meh ? xD

10) survivors suck !? tsk . ur zhong shi reader gnna run liao ehx .

11) lol hat and sock of cuz got link . and and . wat took u so long to noe ure dumb LOL

12) i noe ! u can call me BenHatHat LOL . btr than wat sugarcan , gans . LOL i own em ! YAY XD

13) lol i bet i find de video funnier than urs lo . is i dun wan to find nia heh .

OP speeches should be like the girl's skirt,
the shorter it is,
the sweeter it is .
RadicalLove

15 Oct

2008-10-15T04:41:00.000-07:00

For my friend,

it's okay for me if we cnt have meet ups .
im used to it anyways .
it's okay if promises are broken .
im used to it too .
it's okay to be troubled , we all go through it .
me too . but why cnt you place more trust in this person here ,
and share th troubles you face ? im not those 酒肉朋友 ,
im one who really cares .
so long as you are happy ,
it's okay . i just dun want to be one of those annoyances .
chill okay ? Claudia :D

Tag replies:
Claudia: Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted . hehe chim right ? right ? fail nvm . ganbatte nxt time lo (:
CLaudia: lol mean that the vid is btr looking that the poster - you lo xD they soooooooo kawaiiiiii xD you ... ._. nth to say lol
Claudia: tsk . socks then hat ma . one on ur leg , one on the head lo ! hair .. got link meh ? lol
Claudia: mwahahahahah im the survivor ! where's my 1 mil dollar ? got watch the show survivor ? hehe . okay i feel lame . >_>
Claudia: wa lao . durian . at least let me take you la . you more embarassing than durian HAHA . jkjk ;x
Claudia: duh . you nt cute worker wat ? tell me the store name if you want me to go la ~ improve the shop sales , let u get bonus HAHA ! see i so good hehe .
Claudia: wa lao . how dare you question my intelligence ! im genius de okay ! mwahahahaahahahahahaha ! mus be you nv study hard . tsk .
Claudia: haha good lo ~ grandpa wan sui ! xD
Claudia: lol so dark still not malay . tsk .
Claudia: ya luh ~ project work ~~~~ zzz . my project is on parent-child relationships . hehe . chim right xDDD
Claudia: lol ask him ? more like ask you luh ! you too many gans liao lo !
Claudia: lol some ppl you spam liao they wont reply . you , i spam liao will die die reply one LOL . of cuz good to spam HAHA !
Claudia: Hey ! if you cnt read the post on my blog, go copy and paste haha .

im not the priority here .
you being happy is .
RadicalLove

14 Oct

2008-10-14T05:12:00.000-07:00

hehe .
i noe . i noe .
im a super duper zooper zonker noob blogger .
not i dun wan to blog de cn,
is i no time + lazy luh x_X sorrys .

sianzzzzzz .
aft promos .
more busy liaoz . KAOZ
stupid PW _l_ freaks .
BLEH .

wateva .

. . .
. . .
i dunno wat else to do liao la .
my swimming aint getting any btr .
at least tats wat i feel .
freaks .
z .
im losing confidence in long d events .
i think i shall keep to the 50 and 100 m events .
z .
haixxxxx .
i hate my physique . z .

well .
time to reply tags etc .
sry lo peeps .

Tag Replies:
Claudia: oooooh so now ure back to being an auntie liao lo ? since nt ah lian ... HAHA
Claudia: tsk . no lo . if nt ah lian , then cfm aunty liao ma . unless you wanna be bimbo LOL . tsk cannot bimbo muz be pretty .. but ure not LOL .
Claudia: fine la exams over HAPPY liao lo . humph . still go work sia . whr got time go out leiii you tell me . tsk . abandon me nia ):
Claudia: project work lo ... its a a level subject .. end of oct is the exam .. have to do an oral presentation on our project for the exam .. waaaaaaaa
Claudia: PW . . nt hard ah . . but very de boring . . sian de lo . but some parts are fun LOL .
Claudia: virus ? cheh . its cuz of u lo . so good to spam . LOL .
Claudia: of cuz u look like malay . so freaking dark siol the effect . summore ur mascara . LOL . MALAY ! xD
Claudia: emo nemo ochibi still say not emo . tsk . dun emo alone come talk to me xD
Claudia: haha hope ur grandpa is fine lo (:
Claudia: book you ? hm . i book you on every single day frm Nov to DEC . dere . registeration done . dun go back on ur word ah ! ure booked by a bookie - me :D
Claudia: tsk . wont fail de la . i too pro liao LOL . if fail . is ur fault . HAHA
Claudia: lol ure still my cute worker lo . still say nv spam . tsk . so many tags liao still say nv . haix . LOL . cute worker !
Claudia: th bet ? hmm . anything lo . juz dun bomb me can liao hehe.
Claudia: LOL . WEEEE eddy nv spam for some time . SO .. IM NUMBER 1 HAHA !
Claudia: ya la ya la you rock my life . i rock your hat xD
Claudia: ur vids are good ....btr than the person that posted em on their blogs. mwahaha.
CLaudia: yea . exams over . AND NO MORE R PAPER FOR ME WOOOOOOOOOOOT !
insignificantme: -.-

what can i do ?
i don't think i can do anything .
RadicalLove

6 Oct

2008-10-06T08:07:00.000-07:00

Maths - A
Chem - A
Econs - S
Phy - E
G.P - E

A A S E E

what more can i say ?

i have never met my own expectations of myself,
never .
RadicalLove

5 Oct

2008-10-05T08:35:00.001-07:00

man ,
tomorrow's the day ,
shucks .
i hate this feeling .

blah .
wateva .
die thn die .
._.

oh and
7 blisters altogether ,
on both feet (foot , wateva)
does NOT feel good at all .
i guess its the result of being a basketball fanatic .

which reminded me .
im still looking forward to playin a game wif JL and KS hees .
im BORED to death laaaa .
EOY hurry and end leeeeeiiiiiiiii .
tsk .

ohoh and check out this song .
<3
Elliot Yamin - Wait For You

Experience is what you get ,
when you did'nt get what you wanted .
- Randy Pausch (Oct. 23, 1960 - July 25, 2008)
RadicalLove